


Bulletproof

by SaxonSpud



Category: Red Dead Redemption (Video Games)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-26
Updated: 2019-11-15
Packaged: 2020-10-28 17:55:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 21
Words: 36,015
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20782706
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SaxonSpud/pseuds/SaxonSpud
Summary: Jesse Maddox lives with her daddy, looking after him and trying to keep him off the bottle since her mama died.Her daddy doesn't do much apart from sit around the house and drink since his wife died. Bringing the money in is left to Jesse.She has a little scam going with the saloon owner in Valentine. She robs the strangers passing through, and he turns a blind eye, for a cut of the take.One night she robs a group of strangers, only to find out later that the man she robs is Dutch Van Der Linde. He doesn't take kindly to being robbed, he will stop at nothing to get his valuables back.





	1. The Usual Creeps

As I approached the house, something didn't feel right. Everything looked normal, but I had a feeling. Call it a gut instinct.

The sun was beginning to set, as I approached the small cabin.

I led Honey, my palomino mare, into the barn.

"Don't get too comfortable, we've got to go out again in a while," I whispered.

She nudged me.

"I know old girl, but I need to make some money," I sighed.

Leaving the barn I headed towards the house. It was shrouded in darkness. That was what was wrong. My Daddy, even when he was drunk, wouldn't sit there in the dark.

I opened the door, tentatively. Looking inside, I allowed my eyes to become accustomed to the gloom. There was still a little light filtering in from the dying sun. It didn't take me long to see the body of my father, propped against the edge of the chair.

It wouldn't have been unusual for me to find him semi-conscious. Usually passed out drunk, but not usually on the floor. That was strange.

"Daddy?" I called out. No response.

I grabbed a lamp from the table, and lit it.

I could now see what had happened.

He had a bloody nose, and bruises starting to appear on his face. No sign of a bottle of whisky anywhere. I rushed over, and managed to man-handle him onto the chair. He groaned. I let out a sigh of relief. He was drunk most of the time, these days. Ever since we lost mama. But I loved him just the same.

"Daddy? What happened." I asked, as he started to come round.

He groaned, "Jesse, they took it...I couldn't pay so they took it."

Tears started to trickle from his eye.

"What Daddy, what did they take?"

I glanced around the cabin, only just noticing the ransacked state it was in. Cupboards flung open, draws thrown on the floor.

"Her wedding band, they took your mama's wedding band." He sobbed.

I flew into a rage, "god-damn money lenders," I growled.

I was angry. Angry with my Daddy, for stooping that low. Angry with myself, because I couldn't make enough money. But more than anything, angry with the money lender, for preying on people who couldn't pay him back, then sending the muscle round.

"C'mon Daddy, lets get you to bed."

I eased my father to his feet, he put his arm around my shoulder and I helped him to bed.

Once he was laying on the bed, I covered him with a blanket.

I turned to leave him, but he grabbed my hand. "I...I'm sorry," he moaned.

I rubbed the back of his hand. "Don't Daddy, its not your fault... Whoever did this is gonna be sorry...real sorry," I hissed.

I walked out of his room, and gently closed the door.

I looked out of the window towards the barn. I needed to head into town, to try and make some money. I'd also see if I could find out who did this to my Daddy.

I didn't really like the idea, of leaving my Daddy, but I didn't have much choice. Doing what I was about to do, I liked even less. But with little work to be had, and no food on the table, I had little choice.

I went to the barn and lead Honey out. I quickly mounted her, and headed off at a trot.

It didn't take long to reach the local town, and I headed to the large saloon.

Valentine. The livestock town always seem to smell of pig shit. I hated the place, but it was a good place to make money. At least for me. People stopped here, just passing through. I could relieve them of their valuables, and never see them again.

I walked through the doors. Eddie the owner of Smithfield's, glared at me from behind the bar. He looked run off his feet. The saloon was unusually busy.

"Jesse! You're late," he growled.

I walked behind the bar, "sorry Eddie, some lowlife beat up my Daddy."

His expression softened, "real sorry to here that, Jesse. Your Daddy didn't deserve that. But we're hellish busy tonight."

I nodded, "so I see. This might lighten the load." I handed him a money clip.

Eddie raised his eyebrows, and nodded to the table in the corner.

"That table have ordered some drinks, smart dressed fella over there should be right up your street," he chuckled.

I smiled, and patted Eddie on the shoulder, and quickly removed my coat, and hung it on the hook in the store room.

I grabbed a tray and some glasses, carefully filling each one with some whisky.

We had a nice little deal going, Eddie and me. I would wait tables for him, relieve the patrons of there valuables, they would be none the wiser.

After taking them to the nearest fence, Eddie would get 15%. He would also pay me the going rate, for a waitress. Which was usually a lot less than the 15% he made from me.

If I got caught, then he'd claim to know nothing about it.

Eddie would always point me in the direction of strangers, who looked like they were just passing through. We never lifted anything from the regulars, that would be too risky.

I adjusted my dress, so that I was showing enough of myself to be a distraction, and let my blonde hair, cascade over one shoulder, leaving my neck bare the other side. I picked up the tray, and headed towards the corner table.

There were three men sitting there. An older gentlemen, smartly dressed, with blond hair, beginning to go grey. He was clean shaven. The second man, was dark. Dark hair, dark clothes, very smartly dressed, younger than the first. But my eyes snapped to the gold rings, and the ruby hanging off his waist coat. The third man, looked rough. Rough clothes, a rough beard, but his eyes. They looked like sapphires.

"Sorry gentlemen, for the delay. We're a little busy tonight," I said, smiling as sweetly as I could. I placed a glass in front of each of them.

"Oh it was worth it, but only if you promise that only you will bring us our drinks tonight," the man with the ruby said, flirtatiously.

I giggled, but inwardly felt nauseous. These city folks were all the same.

"Why don't I bring you another round," I suggested.

He slid some money across the table. As I went to pick it up, he put his hand over the top of mine.

"keep the change," he purred.

I smiled again, "thank you sir!"

I beat a hasty retreat, and headed back to the bar.

"Well?" Eddie asked, as I returned.

I opened my mouth, and poked my finger in it, pretending to vomit. "the usual creeps, but one of them is loaded," I whispered.

"Just be careful," he warned.

I nodded "I may need a little assistance for this one," I added, before I loaded the tray with glasses again. I gave it a few minutes before I headed back to the table.

I had just reached the table, where I placed down the tray, before removing the empties, and replacing them with the filled glasses.

As if on queue, my stooge arrived. Billy, a friend of Eddies. When we needed to lift something that needed a little more distraction, he was always happy to lend a hand, for a cut.

Billy grabbed me from behind, playing the drunk.

"Jesse, where have you been, sweetheart."

I shrieked, "No, Please get off."

As if on queue, the dark haired man stood up, "I think you need to unhand the lady," he growled.

Billy, shoved me into the man, he was knocked slightly of balance, enough for me to lift what I wanted from him. Sliding it into Billy's pocket.

Eddie came rushing over and grabbed Billy, "get out, he yelled. I've told you about keeping your hands to yourself."

He manhandled Billy to the door, as I turned on the fake water works.

Eddie came back, put his arm around my shoulder.

"I hope she's ok?" the man asked.

Eddie nodded, "she'll be fine," he said as he escorted me a way from the table.

It was at that point, all hell broke loose. The man stood up, and grabbed me by the shoulder.

"so you think you can steal from me, do you?" he growled.

Eddie turned around, "what the hell are you talking about!" he hissed, "she's just been molested, and you're calling her a thief!"

I started to sob, blinking and making big brown doe eyes, allowing the tears to run down my face. I was such a good actress.

"I'm not a thief, I haven't taken anything."I sobbed

The man looked angry. Maybe lifting from him had been a mistake. He grabbed hold of my arm, his fingers digging in roughly.

He shoved his hand into my skirt pocket, searching around for his stolen pocket watch and ruby. He pulled out a picture in a small frame.

"What's this!" he hissed.

Eddie glared at him, "that's her mama, she died last month."

I did miss my mama, but if we ever got caught, this always made the victim feel bad. Like right now.

I increased the volume of the sobbing, quite dramatically.

"I'm sorry," the man said, "I must have been mistaken."

Eddie grabbed the photo off of him, and escorted me back to the bar, then into the store room at the back.

"That was fucking close!" he hissed. "you better stay here, until closing time."

I nodded, the last thing I needed was for them to follow me.

"What's Billy done with the goods?" I asked.

Eddie chuckled, "usual place, in the metal box in your barn."

I nodded, and watched as Eddie returned to the bar.

I hated this part the most. Sitting on my backside for two hours, pretending to be distraught. Eddie wasn't too keen either, as it meant he had to tend the bar by himself.

Finally Eddie came back, "They've left, they're still trying figure out, who lifted it," he chuckled.

I pulled on my coat. "I better get home, I need to go check on Daddy."

Eddie nodded, "hope your Daddy is ok."

"If you hear anything, let me know, I intend to find the bastard that did it," I sneered.

Eddie nodded, "what do you reckon tonight's little haul'll fetch?"

I chuckled, "a few hundred, I'll get you and Billy's share back to you as soon as I've dealt with the fence."

Eddie smiled, "stay safe Jesse."

I nodded, and headed out the door, to where Honey was hitched.

I quickly looked round, making sure no one was lurking. It was pretty late, and dark so I quickly mounted up and headed for home.


	2. Just my luck

My initial instinct, when I go home, was to check the box in the barn. But I had always been cautious, so decided to wait until morning. Just in case I had been followed.

Despite the three men leaving me alone, I had a funny feeling they didn't buy the act. If they had followed me home, the last thing I wanted was for them to see me delving into the box, hidden in the floor of the barn. Besides it would be quite safe with Honey standing over the patch of floor, where the box was hidden.

The other thing on my mind was if the loan shark came back, and turned over the house again. I didn't really want to lose that ruby.

I led Honey into the barn, and took off her saddle and bridle, before giving her a quick brush. Then went into the house.

Daddy was still asleep in bed. He would be a bit bruised, but physically he would be fine. Emotionally would be a different matter. I hoped that who-ever took the wedding band, would take it to the nearest fence. I could check that when I fenced the Pocket watch. Whilst I knew the ruby was worth more, I had already decided to sit on it for a while. It would just be too hot at the moment.

After checking on Daddy, I made sure all the doors were locked. Peering out the window, it didn't look like I had been followed, so I headed for bed. After the events of the day, it wasn't long before sleep took me.

I woke at dawn, the sun shining through the bedroom window giving everything a warm glow. Glancing out the window, the sky was a beautiful azure blue. It was gonna be another hot one.

I grabbed my jeans and a plain shirt. Followed by my gun belt and knife. I only wore a dress when I was working at the saloon. I'd always found the fences gave you a better price, if you didn't dress particularly femininely. I'd planned on taking the pocket watch over to Seamus, then give it a couple of days and I would do the same with the ruby. At least that way, Eddie and Billy wouldn't be hassling me for their share.

When I opened the front door, I hesitated and looked around. Last night had been close. I still wasn't 100% sure that the men believed my story, but hopefully they would be long gone by now.

Anyway, there was no-one about, so I headed to the barn.

After saddling Honey, I tied her up outside. Slipping back into the barn, I went to the stall, where Honey normally stood. Clearing away the straw, I found the loose wooden plank, and lifted it.

Underneath was the storage box. I opened it up, and grabbed the pocket watch, leaving the ruby in the bottom. I quickly closed the box and replaced the plank, putting straw back over the top.

The pocket watch, I chucked in my satchel, then went outside.

I smiled to myself before mounting Honey, and heading towards Emerald Ranch.

Seamus was in his usual place leaning on the work bench beside the big barn. He thought his sideline was a deep dark secret, but everyone in the state new Seamus's sideline, so the only person he was fooling was himself.

He smiled as I approached, "been a while, Jesse. You been behavin'" he chuckled.

"About as much as you," I huffed in reply.

He rolled his eyes.

"I need a favour Seamus?" I confided

He hummed at me in response.

"If someone brings in a wedding band, gold, with an inscription Amelia and Henry Maddox on the inside. Put it to one side will ya, I'll buy it off ya."

Seamus frowned. "Aint had nothin' yet. But I'll keep a lookout."

"Thanks, some lowlife, beat up my daddy, and stole my mama's wedding band." I growled.

Seamus just nodded, he never was one for a sympathetic ear.

"Now, what can you give me for this?" I pulled out the pocket watch and put in on the table.

To be fair, I hadn't noticed what a nice piece it was, it being dark, and almost getting rumbled. It was gold, with nice engraving. The watch face was clean too, and no scratches.

Seamus hummed, "this is a fine piece, I can give you fifty for it?" he offered.

I stood there and hummed, playing him at his own game.

"Ok seventy five," he grunted.

I smiled, "Deal Seamus."

He slid the money across, and quickly hid the watch under the counter.

"I have something else, precious stone, but its a bit hot right now, I'll come by later in the week." I added.

Seamus nodded, and smiled.

I walked back to Honey, and mounted. I doubted whether I would see my mama's wedding ring again, but it was worth a shot.

I decided to head back to Valentine, and give Billy and Eddie their share, before heading home.

I rode into Valentine, and headed for the Saloon. I hitched Honey, and walked inside.

It was a bit early in the day, and only a few regulars sat at tables, with nothing better to do than drown their sorrows.

I waved across at Eddie. When he saw me, I saw the look of panic on his face.

I chuckled, "what's with you?"

He grabbed my shirt, and dragged me across the bar towards him.

"The gear you lifted, where is it." he sputtered.

"Eddie!" I growled, trying to make him let go.

He finally released his grip.

I scowled at him, and pushed some money across the counter. "Yours and Billy's share." I whispered.

Eddie sighed, "Shit!" he grumbled under his breath.

I frowned, "what the matter, I thought you'd be pleased, its only for the watch, I'll shift the..."

Eddie quickly shushed me, as he glanced around the saloon.

"The man last night, he's fucking Dutch Van Der Linde." Eddie hesitated, "ya know, the Blackwater ferry, that lot!"

"Crap," I muttered under my breath.

"That's not all, the one who was with them, beard, roughly dressed?"

I nodded.

"That's Arthur Morgan, he's the one that beat up your daddy, he's their enforcer, works with a loan shark, a German fella!"

"Leopold Strauss," I snarled, "then Arthur fucking Morgan has my mama's wedding ring!"

Eddie looked at me, panicked, "Now Jesse, don't you go and do nothing stupid, will ya,"

I rolled my eyes, "He beat up an old man, Eddie. For what? Twenty dollars that he didn't have!"

Eddie leaned over the bar towards me, "Look Jesse, ya see that window, or should I say the missing window."

I looked across to the front of the Saloon. To be honest, I hadnt noticed it when I came in.

"What about it?" I asked.

Eddie sighed, "Tommy threw your Arthur Morgan out of that window this morning. Tommy's upstairs, barely hanging on. Your Arthur Morgan, nearly beat him to death with his bare hands, even after Tommy had chucked him out the window!"

I scowled, "then the sooner I deal with the bastard, the better. He keeps going round beating on people for money, sooner or later someone's gonna die." I growled.

"Well fucking make sure it isnt you, maybe we should try and give the ruby back to Van Der Linde." he suggested.

"Over my fucking dead body!" I growled, "he's not getting that back, not until I get back my mama's wedding band, and then only maybe!"

Eddie narrowed his eyes, "then you better find a better hiding place for it, just in case. Chances are he knows it was you, he ain't stupid."

I nodded, "and I bet fucking Seamus, wont keep his mouth shut, if they find his watch!"

"Just be careful out there, ok. Lets not lift anything for a while, at least not in here." Eddie suggested. "They're a nasty lot, that gang. Rumour has it, they robbed that Cornwall train, as well. There were dead bodies strewn along the track for miles!"

You chuckled inwardly, you were pretty sure that was an exaggeration, well you hoped so anyway.

"I'll give Seamus a wide berth then, he wont have any qualms dealing with 'em. But I'll come to work later, otherwise it'll look too suspicious." I added.

Eddie nodded. "lets hope they move on quickly, or at least they don't come in here too often."

I gave Eddie a wave, and headed out the Saloon. Time to move the little trinket I had stashed in the barn. Just my luck that I'd robbed Dutch fucking Van Der Linde, only thing worse would have been if I tried to rob Colm O'Driscoll. There wasn't a lot of difference.


	3. Thin Ice

As I rode out of Valentine, and back home, I kind of became a bit paranoid. Glancing over my shoulder every five minutes to make sure I wasn't being followed. Arthur Morgan had obviously been to my home once, when he beat up on my daddy. He would have no reason to come back, unless one of them had followed me, the night I lifted Dutch Van Der Linde’s valuables. Even if they found the watch with Seamus, and Seamus ratted me out. He only knew my first name. He didn't know where I lived. Leastways I hoped he didn't.

When I reached the house, I hitched Honey outside the barn, and went into the house. Daddy was still in bed. The beating he’d got from Arthur fucking Morgan, had taken it out of him. He hadn’t even got up to try and find a whisky bottle.

I made some coffee, and put a tot of whisky in the cup, then I took it through to daddy. Hopefully it would ease his aches a bit. I also put some bread and cheese on a plate for him. Not the I was expecting him to eat, but at least I could try. I still wasn't sure if it was the depression at losing mama’s wedding band, or the soreness from the beating, that was keeping daddy in bed. I would give it a couple of days, before I nagged him to get up.

Once I’d made sure that daddy was OK, I headed out to the barn. I opened the box under the loose floorboard in the barn, and grabbed the ruby, on the gold chain. It was a beautiful thing. I imagined how pissed Dutch Van Der Linde would be at losing it, and chuckled to myself. I’d already decided that I wasn’t going to take it to Seamus. I would probably get a better price at one of the other fences. Maybe in Rhodes or St. Denis. Plus I didn't think it would be wise to go to the same fence, that already had the outlaws watch. First though, I had to hide the little treasure, for a while at least. I knew just the spot.

I headed out of the barn, glancing around, the coast seemed to be clear. I mounted Honey and headed towards Cumberland falls.

There were a few people milling around on the roads, but no sign of any of the three men from the saloon. With a bit of luck, Arthur Morgan was still nursing his wounds from Tommy.

I finally reached the falls, and left honey grazing on a patch of grass.

I made my way along the river bank, until I reached a fallen log, which had a slight incline. It looked like it lead nowhere, but I knew better. I balanced along the log, then jumped onto a ledge.

The ledge appeared to stop at the falls, but I carried on walking through the falling water. Beyond it was a small cave, behind the waterfall.

There were plenty of little cracks and crevices, but I headed towards the back corner. Lifting a couple of small rocks, there was a small hole at the base of the ledge.

I wrapped the ruby and chain in a small handkerchief, and dropped it in the whole. I then replaced the rocks.

I smiled to myself. I couldn’t see Dutch Van Der Linde, walking behind a waterfall in his posh clothes. As for Arthur Morgan, he was too much of lunkhead to even think there would be cave behind a waterfall, let alone find it. I didn't know about the third man, I didn't even know who he was.

Happy with my hiding place, I left the cave behind the waterfall and headed home. I just needed to change my clothes and head over to the saloon. Try and make everything look as normal as possible.

Arriving back at the house, nothing seemed out of place. I checked on daddy before I left for the saloon. He’d at least eaten some of the bread and cheese I had left. He was still sleeping so I didn't disturb him.

I quickly changed into a skirt and blouse, and headed to the Saloon.

I did wonder if Eddie was being a little over anxious. After all, why would a bunch of outlaws who robbed a ferry and a train, be bothered with one little ruby. I reckoned, give it a week, and I could quite easily get rid of it and be quids in.

As I arrived at the saloon, I noticed that the window has been replaced. I just had to hope I was in for a quiet night, if I could be that lucky. At least I wasn't late tonight.

The saloon was pretty quiet, but it was early yet. I walked behind the bar, and saw Eddie cleaning glasses.

“Everything ok?” I asked, not wanting to be too specific.

He nodded, “just the regulars so far, lets hope it stays that way. Did you…?”

He left the question open ended.

I just nodded, “It’s safe,” I smiled.

Eddie didn't smile. I could see from the look on his face his was still worried.

I chuckled, “honestly Eddie, you worry too much!”

He rolled his eyes, so I left him to his glass cleaning. It seemed to calm him down a bit. I served a few customers at the bar, until it started to get busy, then I started waiting a few tables.

The saloon slowly started to get busier. I was just clearing away some empty glasses when I felt a tap on my shoulder.

“Excuse me miss?”

I froze, my heart started pounding. I recognised the voice. It was the man from last night, Dutch Van Der Linde. I licked my lips and took a deep breath, before turning round. I only just noticed how tall he was now. I hadn’t really noticed last night, perhaps because I was too busy concentrating on his valuables.

“Good evening sir, how can I help,” I replied smiling. My outward confidence, belying the fact that I was bundle of nerves.

He sat down, “can we get four whiskies over here?”

I looked at the four men sat around the table, three of them were the same men from the previous night, the fourth seemed a lot younger, and had a nasty wound on his face, fairly new by all accounts.

“Of course,” I smiled as sweetly as I was able, and high tailed it to the bar.

“Eddie!” I hissed, “They’re back!”

Eddie’s face suddenly lost all its colour, “We’re fucked,” he groaned.

“Listen, just keep calm, If you lose it, then they’ll suspect something!” I warned.

Eddie nodded, “take them their drinks, and I’ll keep an eye on them, if worse comes to worse you can slip out the back,” he suggested.

I shook my head, “If I suddenly disappear, they’ll know something’s wrong. Now hurry up with the drinks.”

Eddie poured four glasses, barely able to stop his hand from shaking. In the end I grabbed the bottle, and poured the rest of the drinks myself.

“Just try and keep calm, Eddie. Go down the other end of the bar or something!” I hissed.

I turned back and headed towards the table. As I approached, the gang leader looked at me, if I had any doubts that he knew I was the thief, they dissipated in that moment, when I saw his cold icy stare.

I looked away, focussing on the glasses, as I set them on the table.

He forced a smile. “Thank you Miss...Maddox.” he smirked.

My heart almost missed a beat, realising that he knew exactly who I was. But my stubbornness got the better of me.

“You’re welcome Mr Van Der Linde,” I retorted, raising my eyebrows slightly and smirking. “will there be anything else,” I asked, finally having the guts to hold his stare.

He narrowed his eyes, “I’m sure there will be!” he said as he necked the glass of whisky. “you better bring me a bottle, I’ve a feeling it’s gonna be a long night,” he growled.

I nodded, and headed back to the bar. Taking deep breaths in an attempt to slow my heart rate.

I found Eddie at the other end of the bar. I quickly grabbed another bottle, and headed over. He was in conversation with one of the regulars, so I tapped him on the shoulder.

“We’ve got a problem, Eddie,” I hissed.

He stared at me, then over at the outlaws. “Shit,” he gasped, “they’re looking over this way.”

I rolled my eyes, “that ain’t the worst of it Eddie, they know who I am! Now how d’ya think that happened?” I accused.

We looked at each other, “Billy!” we echoed.

I shrugged, “can’t do much about it now, lets hope he didn't spill his guts,” I hesitated, “I better get back there with this bottle!”

I walked back over the bottle, and put it on the table.

“That’ll be ten dollars,” I said.

Dutch Van Der Linde hummed, “I think maybe I’m in credit, don't you?” he scowled.

I glanced at Arthur Morgan, then over at the window. “I doubt it,” I retorted, unless your friend has paid to replace the window.

You heard the younger man with the scars, stifle a laugh, which came out as a snort.

Dutch Van Der Linde, didn't find it very funny, and he glared the man.

The older man, pulled out ten dollars, and placed it on the table. As I reached down to pick it up, Dutch Van Der Linde, grabbed my wrist.

“You’re treading on very thin Ice, Jesse Maddox,” he hissed.

I stared him down, “and so are you Dutch Van Der Linde, I’m guessing most people round here, haven't sussed out who you are, but I have. So I suggest you take your filthy hand off of me!” I snarled.

“Is there a problem?” Eddie demanded. I hadn’t heard him walk over.

My wrist was immediately released, and I took the money.

“Nothing I can’t handle,” I hissed. I turned and headed back towards the bar.

Eddie must have found some backbone, because he glared at Dutch Van Der Linde.

“If you can’t keep your hands off my waitresses, I suggest that you leave,” he growled.

Dutch held his hands up, “just an honest mistake,” he assured.

Eddie nodded, and turned away, following me back to the bar.

Once we were out of earshot, I turned and smiled at Eddie, “I didn't know you had it in you!”

He rolled his eyes, “neither did I, now I suggest you slope off, out the back way, before they notice you’re gone. If you ask me, he knows you stole from him, you need to keep a low profile, until they move on!”

I nodded, “he knows alright, I’m just not sure why he hasn't sent his enforcer round.”

Eddie shook his head, “you better pray to god he doesn’t, they think nothing of killing, you only have to ask the family of the poor girl they murdered in Blackwater.”

“Eddie,” I hesitated, “Promise me, If anything happens to me, you make sure you tell the sheriff, who’s been drinking in your saloon.”

Eddie nodded, “I promise, now get off home, before they notice you’re gone.”


	4. Tit for Tat

I walked over to the side door, and quietly opened it. It was dark outside, it must have been about ten thirty. Early yet for some of the patrons, so the side alley was quiet. I just had to unhitch Honey from the front, without being noticed.

As I headed down the alley a dark figure blocked my way.

“Going somewhere Miss Maddox?” he hissed.

Arthur fucking Morgan.

“Yes, so if you’ll excuse me.” I huffed, puffing my chest out with a bravado I didn't have.

He stood there, arms by his side and didn't move. I heard a clink of spurs behind me, and I spun around.

“I don’t think so Miss Maddox, you and I need to have a little chat,” Dutch growled.

Turning to face him, with Arthur Morgan behind me was a mistake I wouldn’t quickly forget. He stepped forward, and grabbed my wrists, holding them behind my back.

I struggled, but he was like a wall of solid muscle, where as I was relatively short, and relied on guile rather than muscle.

Dutch looked at me and smirked, before pulling up the hem of my skirt. I kicked out with my leg, but he grabbed my foot. Sliding his hand up my leg, he found the stiletto knife, strapped to my leg, and withdrew it, dropping my foot to the ground.

“We wouldn’t want any accidents,” he quipped, throwing the knife behind him, further down the alley.

“What the hell do you want?” I growled.

Dutch glared at me, “I think you know what what I want,” he retorted.

I felt rope on my wrists as Arthur bound them behind my back.

I half turned my head, “What the hell you think you’re doing,” I screamed.

He held me with one hand, and with the other he grabbed my hair.

It felt like my scalp was on fire, as he yanked my head back harshly.

Dutch stepped into my space, and grabbed hold of my chin, forcefully.

“Where is it?” He growled. “I know you took it.”

“Took what, I don't know what your talking about,” I squealed.

Dutch release my chin, and smirked, “I know you have it, sweetheart. Your friend Billy, squealed like a girl. Right before I slit his throat.”

I gulped, “Y… You killed B… Billy?” tears started to pool in my eyes.

Dutch touched my cheek, making me shudder.

“You’re lucky you’re such a pretty little thing, otherwise...” he trailed off.

From somewhere deep within me anger started to grow.

“Fuck you!” I growled, “go ahead, kill me. If you do, you’ll never get it back, I’m the only one who knows where it is.” I spat.

Dutch removed his hand, and took a step back. He folded his arms, and chuckled.

“Arthur, take her back to camp,” he ordered. He looked at me, and smirked.

“Such a feisty little thing, ain't ya. By the time I’ve finished with you, you’ll be beggin’ to tell me where it is.”

He pulled out his gun, and in one swift move, he tossed it in the air, and caught it by the barrel.

The next thing I knew, I felt a pain in my jaw, as the handle made contact. Then darkness.

When I woke up the first thing I noticed was my throbbing jaw. What a bastard, I thought. The next thing was I was tied to something, a post of some description, arms above my head, secured at the wrists. my eyes slowly adjusted to the light. I was in a tent, sat on the floor. My ankles were tied together. There was no getting out of this in a hurry. I closed my eyes and leaned my head back against the post. Not much chance of sleep either. I hoped that Eddie would do what he promised. Surely the sheriff must know about the gangs wandering around, or maybe he didn't care, or he was scared, or paid off. Perhaps I was up the proverbial shit creek, with no paddle.

Still, at least I still had my clothes on. I hoped they would stay that way, but from what I’d heard, that could be short-lived.

I had to steel myself. My biggest strength was that I was the only one who knew the location of that damn ruby. I did wonder at my pain threshold, and the threat that echoed in my mind _b__y the time I’ve finished with you, you’ll be beggin’ to tell me where it __i__s._

Which made me wonder, where the hell was my captor. Then panic set it, what if he hurt my daddy, or Eddie. He’d killed Billy, or at least he said he had. I had no reason to doubt that.

I looked across as the ten flap opened. In he walked. Dutch Van Der Linde.

“Ah Miss Maddox, welcome to your new home, are you ready to talk yet.” he smirked.

Damn how I’d like to wipe that smirk off his face.

I hummed, “now let me think, nope I think I’ll just sit here tied to this post” I smirked back.

Success. That had definitely wiped the smile off his face. But I wasn't sure I liked the new look.

He crouched down and grabbed my chin, harshly. I winced, where he’d hid me with the gun.

“Don't test me, Miss Maddox,” he growled. “You will tell me where it is, you might as well make it easy on yourself, and tell me now.”

I sighed, his expression softened slightly. I figured that he thought I was gonna fold.

I looked him in the eye, holding his gaze. “Fuck off,” I spat.

He stood up, glaring at me. Anger causing his face to flush. He grabbed my hair and yanked my head back, it hit the post with a thud. He pulled out his revolver, and cocked the hammer. He pressed the barrel hard against my cheek, until I could feel the metal pressing on my jawbone.

I felt bile rising in my throat, as the thought that he might actually kill me came to me. My heart was thumping so loudly in my chest, I was sure he could hear it, as well as me.

I closed my eyes, I now wasn't convinced that he actually wanted the ruby, because he wanted it specifically, but maybe just because he couldn't bear the thought of someone stealing from him.

If I was wrong, and it was the latter, then in a few moments I would be dead. If he was just trying to frighten me, then he just succeeded. That didn't mean I would tell him where I’d hidden it. Because I also figured, once he knew where it was, I’d be dead anyway.

I heard the hammer of the revolver click again, and the sound of the gun being holstered. He still had a tight grip on my hair, and my scalp was on fire. I felt his breath next to my face, as he whispered in my ear.

“You will tell me, I promise you that,” he threatened.

I clamped my eyes closed.

Eventually he let go of my hair. I heard him open the tent flap and leave. At that point I opened my eyes, and started to shake. I now realised how much deep shit I was in.

He didn't come back for the rest of the night. I wondered if this was his tent, or whether it was just a place to store any prisoners. I closed my eyes, but of course I didn't sleep. Whether it was the uncomfortable position, or the fear of someone coming to kill me in my sleep, I didn't know.

It was when dawn broke, and I was pretty much ignored, I wondered what was going on.

Both the front and back flaps of the tent were opened. It gave me a chance to look around. The tent, was pretty luxurious as tents go. A cot, a bookshelf, a desk a big animal fur on the ground and a gramophone.

I could also see a lot of the camp from here. I was surprised at the number of people milling around. A few people stared at me, but didn't seem surprise to see me tied to a post. I also noticed another poor soul tied to a tree. He looked in an even sorrier state than me. I wondered how long he’d been here for, and what crime he had committed against Dutch Van Der Linde.

As the day ended, I found my mouth becoming dry. Also the ache in my arms started to change into pain, as my muscles began to cramp from not being able to move. It was then that I figured his plan. The pain would be bound to get worse. With no water forthcoming, I could only assume that the same would be true of any food. No doubt I would get stomach cramps before long. My last proper meal had been yesterday. With the likelihood of little sleep as well, I could see how after a few days I might be prepared to tell him. Instead of dwelling on that, I closed my eyes and focussed on my breathing. I may not be able to sleep but I could try and zone out.

And that's exactly what happened. I found the zoning out helped, but the pains in my stomach started to get worse, my mouth felt like the desert, and my arms passed from pain into numbness. The only positive was that no one was hassling me for the location of the ruby.

I was awakened with someone kicking my leg. It was light again. Maybe I had fallen asleep. I blinked and looked up. I had no idea how long I had been tied to the this post.

“You ready to talk yet, thief?”

I swallowed what little spit I had in my mouth, and saw the sapphire eyes, staring at me.

“Mr Morgan,” I croaked. “takes a thief to know one.”

He crouched down, and grabbed my chin. Roughly, but not as roughly as Van Der Linde had done.

He tilted my head from side to side.

“It still looks the same as it did, when your boss slugged me,” I quipped. I licked my lips but there was little moisture to put on the cracks there.

I closed my eyes.

“Oi, open your eyes,” he growled, as he slapped me on the face. I was surprised, it wasn't that hard.

I opened my eyes, “what!” I grumbled.

“Listen,” he growled, “If you don't talk, then you’re gonna be dead.”

“Well, that's not really a surprise, you’re outlaws, you kill people, and steal their stuff!” I croaked, sarcastically. “oh and starve them to death!”

“You only have to tell me where the ruby is, then this will all be over!”

I looked past Arthur Morgan, as your eyes focused on Dutch Van Der Linde.

I chuckled, “yeah, all over like Billy. What will it be, a bullet between the eyes, A knife in my gut, what's the weapon of choice for outlaws these days.”

Dutch chuckled, “You’ve got some spunk, Billy’s not dead, I just told you that to scare you, it didn't work.”

I closed my eyes, “It makes no difference, you won’t ever see your precious ruby again, not unless you return what was mine to me.”

I felt a hand on my chin again, “not this again,” I sighed.

“What are you talking about!” Dutch hissed.

I opened my eyes, “ask lunkhead, over there?”

He let go of my chin, “What’s she talking about, Arthur” he demanded.

“How the hell am I supposed to know, she’s talking in ridd...” Arthur stopped mid sentence, “Oh Shit!” he exclaimed.

“What is it?” Dutch asked.

“Maddox, one of Strauss’s debtors. Didn’t have the money, after I knocked him about a bit, I rifled around and took some stuff,” he admitted.

“My daddy, sometimes, things are more than just things, you might learn that one day.” I croaked.

I closed my eyes, I didn’t have the energy.

“Jesse, open you’re eyes!”

I felt a hand slapping my face, something scratched my cheek.

I struggled to open my eyes, as I did I saw a glint of metal. Someone had just cut the ropes on my wrists. As my arms were pulled from their vertical position, I screamed, as blood started to circulate again. As the numbness subsided, the pain was excruciating. I felt water on my lips as someone put a canteen to my mouth.

Why now. Why didn't someone do this days ago. Then my face was being slapped again.

“Jesse, open your eyes, right now,” he shouted.

I opened my eyes, to see Dutch, kneeling on the floor next to me.

“Tell me, what do you want back in exchange for the ruby?”

“Please,” I begged, “the pain!”

“Drink,” he commanded. "Then tell me, and I'll end the pain."

I drank some more water, It didn't do a great deal for the pain in my arm.

“What's so special about that ruby,” I groaned.

Dutch narrowed his eyes, “that's none of your business!” he growled, “Just tell me what you want?”


	5. A deal with the Devil

I groaned, the pain in my arms was too much, I screwed my eyes shut and let out a whimper.

“Tell me Jesse,” Dutch demanded, once again.

“Mama’s wedding band, I want it back,” I groaned, “and...”

“Arthur,” Dutch growled, “help me get her on the cot, then start looking for the damn wedding ring,” he hissed.

“Jesse, tell me what else?” Dutch demanded.

I opened my eyes, “Strauss and Arthur,” I groaned, “they have to stop,”

Dutch stared at me, “That’s a big ask, Jesse. I might need something else in return.”

I closed my eyes, right now I’d agree to anything to ease the fire in by arms.

“Pl… please,” I begged, “my arms.”

Dutch nodded. He started to unbutton my blouse, my arms hurt so much, I couldn't even move to stop him.

“No!” I screamed, “What the fuck are you doing!”

He stopped, and looked at me, “don’t you trust me Jesse,” he smirked.

“You sick fuck!” I Screamed, “you do anything and you can kiss your ruby goodbye.”

He rolled his eyes, and carried on unbuttoning my shirt.

“Please don’t!” I sobbed.

Dutch sighed, “just calm down, I’m not gonna hurt you,” he whispered.

He dragged the shirt off my shoulder, and pulled it down my arms, so it pooled at my wrists.

I watched through teary eyes, as he took off his rings. His hand gripped my shoulder, and I flinched. He completely ignored that, as he started to knead and massage the muscles in my shoulders and arms. He was rough, and it hurt. But not like the pain I had in my arms from before. It was a good hurt, as the pain from the cramped muscles started to subside.

My sobbing stopped, and was now a gentle whimper, as Dutch’s strong hands worked away. I found myself relaxing, and I closed my eyes.

I heard him chuckle, “See, I ain't all that bad, least not all of the time!”

I opened my eyes, “you’re still a bastard,” I hissed.

He stopped his massaging and slid his hands down my arm so they were holding my wrists. He clamped them down on the cot, and leant over, his face just a few inches from mine.

“You have no idea,” he smirked.

I tensed up. I tried to pull away from his grip. Even though the pain had eased from my muscles, they were still sore, and I was no match for his strength.

He stared at me intensely, at licked his lips.

Before I could even think, his lips were on mine. I tried to pull away, but there was nowhere to go, each move of my head to get away from him, he matched with his own.

Eventually he pulled away and chuckled, licking his lips.

“don’t you taste sweet, Jesse Maddox. I can’t wait to taste more.”

I glared at him, “you complete...”

“Tut tut, Miss Maddox!” he interrupted. “Sit up!” he released my wrists.

I looked at him, not sure what he would do if I declined, so I sat up.

He sat on the edge of the cot, and pull my shirt back over my shoulders, and buttoned it back up.

I looked at him, a little confused. One minute he’s forcing kisses on me, the next he’s dressing me. He must be one fucked up son of a bitch.

He stood up, “Now, I’m sorry to have to do this, but needs must.”

He sat behind me, and grabbed my wrists again, tying them behind my back.

“You should still have a little movement, so the muscles don't get cramped,” he added.

I shook my head. “you could have left them untied.”

Dutch chuckled, “and let you run away, I don’t think so!”

He stood up, and walked to one of the open ends of the tent.

“Mary-Beth,” he yelled, “be a dear and fetch me a bowl of stew, would you?”

I frowned, why the hell would a gang of outlaws have women running around the place.

After a few minutes a pretty young girl came walking over, smiling.

“Here ya go Dutch, you need anything else?” she asked.

Dutch smiled at her, as he took the bowl, “Thank you, sweetheart, you run a long and read some of your books.”

I stared at him, “what the hell…?”

He laughed, “not what you were expecting eh? Now you must be hungry.”

Dutch sat on the edge of the cot, and lifted up a spoon of stew.

“Your gonna feed me?” I huffed.

He smiled, “well you can’t feed yourself, and its been almost a week, since you ate. You must be hungry!”

“A week!” I exclaimed.

He just stared at me, with the spoon raised. I opened my mouth, and he put the spoon in it.

The stew was surprisingly good. As the food hit my stomach, it begged for more, with a loud grumble coming from it.

Dutch chuckled, and carried on feeding me, until all the stew was gone.

He stood up. “Now get some rest,” he ordered, “I’ll come back later to discuss what you can do for me!”

I frowned, “What?”

He smirked, “if you want me to stop Strauss and Arthur, you’re gonna need to give me something in return!”

“Like what!” I retorted.

Dutch chuckled, and stroked my cheek. “You’re a clever girl, you work it out!”

I watched him as he walked to each end of the tent, and closed the flaps.

“I’m not…” I started.

Dutch walked over to the cot and pressed his hand on my chest, forcing me to lay down.

“Sweet dreams, Miss Maddox. We’ll talk later.” he chirped.

I watched him as he walked out the tent. In hindsight, maybe asking him to stop Strauss and Arthur had been a mistake. I should have been satisfied with getting mama’s wedding band back. Now I’d jumped out of the frying pan and into the fire. After him forcing that kiss on me, goodness only knows what he would do next. Or if I would have any real choice in the matter.

One thing he was right about though, I was tired.

Despite my hands and ankles still being tied, I managed to adjust my position, so I was lying on my side. The cot was surprisingly comfortable. So I closed my eyes, and drifted off to sleep.


	6. The Truth Hurts

Red rays of the setting sun filtered through the gaps in the canvas, as I opened my eyes.

It didn't much matter, awake or asleep I was stuck, tied up on this cot. The flaps remained closed, and couldn't open them, even if I could get off the cot.

I wriggled my ankles, hoping that I could get free, but the ropes were tight.

Then I realised, they may be tight, but they were tied over my boots. All I had to do was slip my feet out of the boots. The question was did I wait until it was completely dark or slip out of them now.

Once my ankles were free, I could make a bid for freedom.

But as with all things, there was a choice. If I managed to escape, I wouldn't be able to stick around. They knew where I lived now, and they knew where I worked. I would have to retrieve the ruby, and head elsewhere. Start afresh and leave my life behind.

Don't wait too long, don't think too hard I said to myself. Daddy needed me, but if I was a prisoner here, I couldn't help him. If I escaped, I just had to bide my time until the gang moved on.

The decision was made. My freedom was more important.

I wriggled my feet inside my boots. I finally managed to pull one of my feet free. Once one was free, the other one came out quite easily.

I slipped quietly from the cot, creeping towards the back of the tent. During the day both ends had been open, and where the tent flaps closed, had not been secured.

I peered out the back of the tent. It was quiet, no one around.

I crouched down, and looked around the side of the tent. I could see a lot of people gathered around the fire, on the far side of the camp. Now was my chance. I crept towards the edge of camp, through where the horses were. A couple of them stamped their feet and whinnied, but nobody seemed to take much notice.

As I crept through the wooded area, I noticed a guard, so I kept close to the trees on the other side of where he was standing. I managed to bypass him, quite easily. Now I had to try and find somehow to cut the ropes off my hands.

Once I was on the main track, I looked up and down, in hopes I could see someone who could help me. But I was out of luck. I started to walk, trying to get my bearings. It was then I realised the camp of the outlaws wasn't that far away from Valentine. I could either head for the Saloon, or I could head for home.

I looked down at my feet. They were cut up quite badly. Running around with nothing on your my feet wasn't the greatest plan. I only just started to feel the pain. I guessed that whilst I was escaping the adrenaline had kicked in, so I hadn't felt anything.

I decided to head for home. At least then I could get a spare pair of boots, get my guns and check on daddy. I wondered what had happened since I’d been kidnapped. If it had really been a week, why wasn't anyone searching.

I put the thought out of my mind, and headed for home.

Progress was slow, my feet hurt more than I thought, and down walking down the main road out of Valentine, sharp stones on the road cut mercilessly into my bare feet.

I stumbled a couple of times, and with my wrists still bound behind me, my arms weren’t available to break my fall. I grazed my chin and face a couple of times.

I slowed my pace, as I limped along. Still no sign of anyone.

I leant against a tree, taking a break for a few moments.

It was at that moment I heard hoof beats. Finally, I thought. I stepped out from behind the tree, as the rider approached.

“Well, well. Our little runaway thief!” Arthur smirked.

I tried to run, pain shooting through my feet.

I didn't get far, as I heard the whoosh of rope flying through the air, and the loop of Arthur Morgan's Lasso looped around my waist.

As the rope went tight, I hit the ground, my face hitting the earth with a thud.

I felt something trickle from my nose, onto my upper lip. I licked it, blood.

I rolled onto my back, “please,” I begged, “just let me go.”

“Sorry sweetheart, I can’t do that, you still have my ruby.” Dutch smirked..

I looked round to see him sitting on the back of his horse, staring down at me.

“Please,” I begged, “I’ll tell you where it is, I just wanna go home,” I sobbed, as tears started to trickle down my face.

Dutch dismounted, and knelt down beside me.

“I told you that you’d be begging to tell me where it was by the time I’d finished with you,” he smirked, “you should have listened to me then, then you wouldn't be in the state your in. Bruised, battered, covered in blood.”

He shook his head and tutted.

“Tell me Jesse, how long have you been thieving?” he asked.

I stared up at him, “Wh… what?”

He put his hand on my back and sat me up. He clicked his fingers, and Arthur passed him a cloth.

He wiped the blood and mud from my face.

“I figure,” he began, “You’ve not been doing this long, maybe since your mama died, hmm?”

I closed my eyes and nodded. “Someone needs to bring some money in, so I can feed me and my daddy, he needs me.”

“I don't think he does, but all the while you’re bringing in the money, he can sit on his backside, crawling into a bottle. You’ve been gone five days Jesse. Didn’t you wonder why no ones come looking?” Dutch asked.

“Th...They are,” I stuttered, holding back the sobs.

Dutch shook his head, “No, they ain't, and you know it deep down. That's why your cryin’. Ain’t because you’re hurt, it’s because you know that your daddy, Eddie, Billy. They don't give a shit about you, not unless you’re bringing in the money.”

I glared at him, “why would you say that, you’re trying to fuck with my head!”

Dutch shook his head, “I’ve seen it all sweetheart, all the people in my camp, my gang. You were surprised that we weren't just a bunch of killers, grisly outlaws. Look on your face, when Mary-Beth came over. It was priceless.” He chuckled. “They all had people using ‘em one way or another, even young Arthur here.” He nodded his head towards where Arthur was standing.

Dutch removed the lasso from around my waist, and handed it back to Arthur.

I looked at the ground, was it true. Did they really not care about me. I sighed.

“What do you want?” I sighed.

Dutch smiled, and put his fingers under my chin, and gently tilted upwards.

“I wanna help you Jesse. Let’s take you back, get you patched up. You can tell me where you’ve hidden my ruby, I’ll give you back your mama’s wedding band, although I don't think you wanted it for you, you wanted it for your daddy. But I don't think your daddy deserves it, or you.”

“Then what?” I asked.

Dutch smiled, “that's up to you, you can leave, carry on thieving for the people who don't really care about you, eventually you’ll get caught, and hanged. Or, you can stay with us, I’ll teach you a few things, you’ll have a home with people who care about you.”

I frowned at him, “you’ll let me leave though, if I want to?”

He nodded, “I ain’t as much of a bastard as you think, well not all the time, what do ya say?”

“What about Arthur and Strauss?” I asked, glancing between Dutch and Arthur.

Dutch shrugged, “I won’t stop Strauss, from his usury, but I can put a stop to him using Arthur for collecting. I don’t think Arthur would complain too strongly about that, would you Arthur?”

Arthur smirked, “I don't get any morbid pleasure from beating people, it’s just a job.”

Dutch pulled a knife from his belt, and sliced through the rope, binding my wrists.

I rubbed them, helping to get the circulation going again.

“Put your arm around my neck,” Dutch suggested.

I frowned, “Why?”

Dutch rolled his eyes, “because you can hardly stand, running around the heartlands at night with bare feet, hasn’t done you any favours.”

I closed my eyes, and my shoulders sagged. It wouldn’t have taken much for me to burst into tears. Not because everywhere hurt, even though it did. But because the realisation had hit me, that maybe the people who I cared about, didn't care as much for me as I thought.

I put my arm around Dutch’s neck and he lifted me up. He sat me on his horse. It was kind of awkward, sitting astride in a skirt, but I managed it.

He mounted up behind, and I felt his arm wrap around my waist. I felt his breath on the back of my neck. It caused me to shiver slightly, as goose bumps formed.

“Don’t worry Jesse, I’m gonna look after you,” he purred in my ear.

I wasn't sure what he meant by that, but at least I wasn't tied up anymore. I also wasn’t in much of a fit state to go anywhere either, so I guessed being tied up didn't really matter.

Riding with Dutch, we were back at camp pretty quickly. I hadn’t really gone very far, probably because of my feet being half shredded by rocks and stones.

He lifted me off his horse effortlessly, and carried me across the camp towards his tent.

“Miss Grimshaw, get me some hot water, rags and alcohol would you,” he yelled at a middle-aged woman, who I hadn't noticed before.

Arthur followed him across the camp, and when we reached his tent, Arthur held the tent flap back while he carried me inside.

My boots were still on the cot, with the rope tied around them.

Dutch set me on the cot, then put the boots and rope on the floor. He looked around at Arthur, who took something out of his jacket pocket.

Dutch came and sat on the edge of the cot.

“Listen, Jesse, because I want you to trust me, I’m giving you this in good faith. I’m hoping you’ll give me something in return.”

He put something in my hand.

I swallowed hard, before looking at it. It was my mother’s wedding band. Her name and my fathers engraved on the inside.

My lip trembled, and a tear escaped from my eye. I bit my lip, hard. To try and stop any more from falling.

I felt Dutch’s hand on my face, as his thumb wiped the tear away. His hand stayed there, I didn't pull away. I looked into his dark brown eyes.

“You know Jesse,” he whispered, “it’s ok to cry.”

I closed my eyes, and took a deep breath. Squeezing the ring so hard, I could feel the metal digging into my skin.

“Look at me,” he whispered.

I opened my eyes, I could feel more tears coming, I couldn't stop them. “I loved her, you know,” I sobbed.

Dutch smiled, and brush the hair from my face, tucking it behind my ear, “I know,” he soothed.

I took another deep breath, “Your ruby, its in a hidden cave behind Cumberland Falls, in a hole in the far corner, covered with rocks.” I hesitated, “if you can’t find it, I’ll show you.” I whispered.

Dutch glanced at Arthur, who left without a word.

A woman came into the tent, I assumed Miss Grimshaw, with a bowl of water, and the other things, Dutch had asked for.

“D’ya need any help,” she asked.

Dutch shook his head, “No, I got this,” he replied.

I watched as she left the tent.

“I’m not gonna lie,” Dutch hesitated, before picking up the bottle of alcohol, “this is gonna hurt.”


	7. Confusion

I didn't really get Dutch Van Der Linde. One minute he was trying to hurt me, kill me even. Then he was making me see the truth of a situation I were trying to run from, or at least hide from. Then he was sensitive and caring. Then he was trying to seduce me.

Right now, he was hurting me. I wasn't quite sure if he was doing because it gave him some sense of victory, or because he felt he had to.

He had told me it would hurt, he hadn’t lied at least.

When he poured the alcohol on the open cuts on my feet, I screamed. Then I sobbed, gripping the sides of the cot, throwing my head back, arching my back, trying to pull my leg away from his vice like grip.

All to no avail, nothing eased the pain as the alcohol burned into the open wound.

I couldn't tell if he had that stupid smirk on his face, or if he was looking at me sympathetically. I’d seen both expressions. Right now, I couldn't see anything, as my eyes were screwed shut. Even If they’d been open, I wouldn’t have seen anything through the blur of tears and pain.

I did hear another voice, the woman, Miss Grimshaw, asking him what the hell he was doing. I didn't hear his response, the screams coming from me managed to blot out any other sound, or voice.

I can only assume that she agreed with this course of action, or was too fearful to tell him otherwise.

She did come back though with bandages. That was after my screams and sobs ended, after he bathed the now clean cuts with the warm water.

He didn't bandage my feet. I think that was Miss Grimshaw.

As I lay on the cot, trying to catch my breath, I felt his hand on my face, shushing me, telling me it was all done. Well on my feet at least. The cuts on my face, he just bathed with warm water.

The hand that held my mama’s wedding band, I had squeezed so tightly that the metal broke the skin. When the pain had started to ease on my feet, he took the ring and placed it on the side table. I didn't fight him. I had little energy left for that. He bathed my hand, and Miss Grimshaw put a bandage on it.

Then he sat there, gently stroking my face, rubbing circles on the palm of my hand that wasn't bandaged. His deep voice, soothing me, until my breathing was less ragged.

Then the bastard put a cup to my mouth, and like an idiot I drank it. It was only when it hit the back of my tongue, that I tasted the bitterness, I realised it was drugged, whatever it was. Then my head began to spin. Then everything went black.

Even the sunlight felt bright through my closed eyelids, and my head felt like it had been hit several times with an iron bar.

I held my hand to my head, just to make sure I was in one piece. Then I remembered the bitter tasting liquid. This had to be the after effects of whatever he had given me.

“Ahh, you’re awake. How are you feeling,” Dutch asked.

My eyes were still closed, but I recognised his voice immediately.

“Like I’ve been hit by a freight train,” I groaned.

I opened my eyes squinting. Then in horror realised, most of my clothes had been removed. I was only wearing my knickers and a shirt.

“You bastard, you drugged me then undressed me, what else did you do,” I hissed.

I tried to sit up, but the throbbing in my head only worsened, so I laid back down again.

I felt him sit on the cot, and he slid his hand under the back of my neck, before tilting my head slightly. I groaned, it seemed the slightest movement made my head hurt.

“Drink,” he commanded.

“Your not gonna drug me again, are you?” I questioned.

He chuckled, and put the cup to my lips.

I let the liquid swill around in my mouth this time, tasting only water, I swallowed.

“You need to drink as much water as you can, that’ll get the rest of the drug out of your system, then your headache should ease,” he explained.

I groaned, “what the hell did you drug me for.”

“You were in pain,” he stated, matter of factly.

I opened my eyes, and glared at him, headache or not.

“Of course I was in fucking pain, you poured neat alcohol into an open wound,” I hissed. “or did you decide that I would be more compliant when you decided to strip me naked?”

Dutch smirked, “not only are you pretty, but you have a lovely body!”

I narrowed my eyes, “So help me, if you ever do that again I’ll...”

“What will you do Jesse,” he licked his lips, “I’d be interested to know?”

I stared at him, in disbelief, he more or less admitted it.

“Ya see Jesse, I think you quite like the idea of me undressing you, looking after you,” he purred.

He leant over and cupped my cheek in his hand.

“You don't seem to be putting up much of a fight.”

He pressed his lips to mine, gently. I could taste the brandy and cigars, as he kissed me. I found myself kissing him back. What the hell!

I pulled away, he didn't force me, like he had the other night, when he’d pinned my wrists to the cot.

I just stared at him, as I licked my lips. Damn I hadn’t meant to do that. At least not while he was looking. But he tasted so good.

I noticed now that the ruby was hanging from his waistcoat. I quickly changed the subject.

“Mr Morgan found your ruby then,” I concluded.

Dutch chuckled, likely at my swift change of subject.

“Yes, Arthur was impressed with your choice of hiding place.”

“We’re quits then,” I retorted.

Dutch stopped laughing, and looked at me. “I was serious about what I said.”

I rolled my eyes, “Is that because your worried about people using me, or because you’d like to keep me here so that you can continue your seduction?”

Dutch smiled, “ya know what I like about you most Jesse, its not that you have a beautiful face, or you have a stunning body, and you have both of those. Its because you’re extremely clever. Other people have tried to rob me, you’re the only one who ever succeeded. That night, I was pretty sure it was you, but I had my doubts, especially when you didn't have the gear on you.”

I bit my lip, and narrowed my eyes. “I don’t get you Mr Van Der Linde, you could be anything, yet you choose to be an Outlaw.”

He let out a huge belly laugh, “No one chooses to be an Outlaw, my dear. Sometimes good people, do bad things.”

I frowned, “is that me as well, a good person, doing bad things.”

He nodded, “or a good person, not having much choice, is probably nearer the truth.”

I hummed. If my mother hadn't died, and my father hadn’t taken to the bottle, I probably wouldn't have turned to thieving.

I sighed as I looked at my bandaged feet.

“Well it looks like I don't have much choice for now, I guess I’m not going anywhere until these heal!”

Dutch chuckled, “Don’t even think about getting off that cot, young lady. If I see one speck of dust on those bandages, you will be in serious trouble!”

I rolled my eyes, I guess I’ll just have to amuse myself.

Dutch laughed, it was almost a growl. “Don’t worry, I won’t desert you. I’m sure I can find plenty of ways to amuse you,” he looked at me darkly, and licked his lips.

I narrowed my eyes, “I hope that doesn't include drugging me and taking my clothes of Mr Van Der Linde.”

He winked at me, somewhat conspiratorially, “Jesse, please call me Dutch. I think if we’re going to get to know each other better, we should at least be on a first name basis.”

I looked at him intently, “maybe you can tell me the story of why you went to such lengths to get back that ruby?”

He returned my gaze, but there was a darkness in his eyes.

“It means more to you than it being just a precious gem?” I concluded.

He looked away, gazing at something only he could see, before he looked at me again, and smiled.

“As you said, sometimes a thing, is more than just a thing. Your mothers wedding band,” he picked up the ruby, hanging from the gold chain on his waistcoat, “This, is as precious to me at your mothers wedding ring is to you. Maybe one day I will share the reason why.”

I looked at him, there was something in his face, a new expression I hadn't seen before, hurt, sadness, tinged with anger.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn't have asked...” I started, but he put a finger to my lip.

“If… No when the time comes, I will tell you.” He stated.

I saw his Adams apple bob, he swallowed hard. I’d touched a nerve somehow.

I quickly changed the subject, “You have a lot of books,” I said, hastily.

He smiled, the previous subject forgotten in an instant. “I shall read to you, then.”

I smiled back, “oh you don't have to.”

He stood up, and walked over to the shelf of books, he pulled one out, “It’s a passion of mine.”

He turned back to the cot, “sit up a minute.” his hand went to my back, and he helped me to sit.

Once I was sitting, he sat behind me. I frowned, wondering what he was doing. I had already discovered with Dutch, that you never really knew what his intentions were.

“Lay down, rest your head on my lap,” he directed.

I hesitated for a moment, then did as he asked. His lap was surprisingly comfortable.

“Now close your eyes,” he instructed.

Again I did as he told me. He started to read. His voice had almost a hypnotic quality, relaxing me though not sending me to sleep. It was only after a few moments I realised that his hand was resting on my head, his thumb rubbing circles on my forehead.

I moaned gently, his touch was soothing the pain in my head.

I heard him chuckle, lowly in between sentences.

Was this how he recruited all his outlaws, I somehow doubted it.

Who ever this man was, he had an enticing quality, and I felt a little like a mouse, caught in a trap.


	8. Doubts

As hard as I tried, I couldn’t stay awake. His gentle hands, his soothing voice. That bastard had it all, and he had me right where he wanted me.

How could I be falling for someone like him. Who always wanted things his way, and worst still always seem to get it.

Was I scared of him. Of course I damn well was. I was in a camp surrounded by his minions, who would do anything he told them. I didn't even have my bargaining chip anymore.

Of course he said I could leave if I wanted to. Did I want to?

Yes...No...Hell, I didn't know. If I’d asked myself that question on the first day I was here, tied to the post, it would have been yes, without a doubt. But now? It would be simpler to leave. But better for me in the long run? That was debatable.

When I next woke, he had stopped reading. My head was no longer in his lap, but laying on the pillow. He hadn’t gone far though. He was sitting on the edge of the cot, stroking my face with the back of his hand.

My eyelids fluttered open. There he was, just staring at me.

“Can I have some water, please?” I asked.

Since I was here until my feet healed, it made sense for me to be polite.

He smiled, and put his hand behind my head, tilting it upwards, before putting the cup to my lips.

After a few sips, he lowered my head. I tried to sit, but he gently pushed back, his hands on my shoulders.

“I want you to rest,” he concluded.

I sighed. “I have rested, I have no intention of sleeping all day.”

He stood up, and folded his arms, he looked slightly annoyed.

“Look, I’m quite capable of knowing how much rest I need,” I snapped, folding my arms across my chest, mirroring him.

Dutch smirked, “Really!”

He pulled back the blanket, from the bottom of the cot, and gripped one of my ankles.

“What are you doing?” I demanded.

He ignored me, and pressed his thumb firmly into the bottom of my foot.

I yelped, as a shaft of pain shot through my foot.

“What the fuck did you do that for?” I shrieked, my eyes screwed shut, waiting for the pain to pass.

He pulled the blanket back over my feet.

“You’re injured Jesse, you need to rest.” he explained.

I opened my eyes and glared at him.

“So inflicting pain, that's your way of proving a point, is it?” I hissed.

He smiled, that irritating smirk of his. “it worked didn't it, you’re laying down, and you closed your eyes!”

I narrowed my eyes, “Fine,” I muttered, “but as soon as I’m healed I’m outta here.”

I rolled over, facing the tent canvas.

I felt him sit on the edge of the cot, and his hand rested on my shoulder, gently massaging it. It was pleasant, but I was pissed at him.

“Listen Jesse, I’m only doing this, for your own good,” he soothed.

I shrugged my shoulder, and he moved his hand away.

“Then let me rest, you no good son of bitch. The sooner I’m rested, the sooner I’ll be outta here.” I growled.

I heard him sigh, and felt the weight lift off the cot, then I heard the tent flap open and close. He was gone.

Who the hell did he think he was anyway. My only hope was that someone else would come in to bring me water or food. Then I could try and ask for their help to get me out of here. I would go home, rest up there. Then I could decide what to do. I knew what was best for me, not some no good outlaw!

I must have stared at that tent canvas, for a good hour. Determined not to close my eyes and go to sleep. Eventually, I rolled onto my back, and sat up.

I grabbed the cup of water from the table, it was still half full, so I drank that, with a new determination.

I pulled off the blanket, and looked at my bandaged feet. It didn't look good. I tried dangling my legs over the side of the cot. I hissed, as the blood flowed down to my feet. I hated to admit it, but maybe he was right.

I was tempted to try and stand, but the throbbing in my feet, told me that was a bad idea. I looked across at the side table, and saw my mama’s ring. Leaning over, I picked it up. There was still dried blood around one edge, where I had crushed it into my hand.

I held it up to the light, looking at the inscription on the inside. The ring was tiny. I couldn't remember my mama having such small fingers. Strange how your memory plays tricks on you. I slid it on to my little finger. It was a perfect fit. I looked at it, and wondered if my daddy really hadn’t bothered to look for me. I rested my forearm over my eyes, as I lay back down. I felt deserted. Maybe it was me, maybe my daddy, and the others were glad to be rid of me. 

A tear trickle down my cheek, so I closed my eyes, trying to keep any more from falling. That failed. But annoyingly Dutch had been right, I did need rest. Trying to resist was useless, and soon sleep took me.

I slept fitfully, my dreams plagued with visions of my daddy, my mama, Eddie and Dutch. Yes, he even invaded my dreams, and not in a good way.

“_Why would I look for you, you’re useless!” Daddy smirked, “even your mama left you.”_

“_Why would I stay, Jesse,” mama groaned, dark rings under her eyes. “you’re no use to me!”_

“_You can’t even steal something with out getting found out,” Eddie hissed._

“_Go on, get out of here, you’re not any use to me! Go on they might as well hang you now,” Dutch smirked._

Tears ran down my cheek, “Why… No.” I mumbled.

I felt a hand stroke my face, “Jesse...Jesse wake up, it’s ok, I got you,” Dutch soothed.

I forced my eyes open, “Wh...what!”

As soon as my eyes opened, I let out a sob.

“Hush now, it was just a bad dream,” Dutch soothed, as he stroked my face.

I took a couple of shallow breaths, “you all said I was useless,” I sobbed, tears still running down my face. “daddy, mama, Eddie. Even you.”

Dutch put his hand, under my back, and pulled me forward against his chest, his other hand on the back of my head, stroking my hair.

“I would never say that, it was just a bad dream,” he rubbed my back, “we’re gonna lay all your demons to rest,” he assured.

My sobbing had begun to subside, “how?” I whimpered.

Dutch pushed me away from him slightly, holding me by my arms. He looked me in the eye.

“We’re gonna pay a call on your daddy, and then on Eddie. You, me and Arthur.” he growled.

He cupped my face in his hand, and stroked my cheek with his thumb.

“I ain’t havin’ anyone upset my girl.” he asserted.

I stared at him, I wasn't quite sure what to say.

Not about paying the people who I thought cared for me, a call. But him describing me as his girl.

Maybe I was reading too much into it. Maybe all the women in his camp, were his girls.

The biggest point was, how the hell was I gonna pay a call to anyone, considering the state of me. I could barely sit up, let alone walk into the saloon and give Eddie a piece of my mind. Or walk into the house, and see what my daddy was up to.

Dutch tilted his head to one side, “you wanna do that?” he asked.

I nodded, “but...”

He smiled, “no buts, we’ll do this.” he hesitated, his expression changed. Not angry, but serious.

“I’m gonna show you I was right. They don’t deserve you, Jesse. None of ‘em.”

He raked his fingers through my hair gently. Stroking it backwards.

Before I realised what was happening, his lips pressed against mine, and his hand slid up the back of my shirt, his hands caressing the bare skin beneath. I trembled, as his fingertips ran along the edge of my back. My core beginning to heat. I moaned, my mouth opening just enough to grant his tongue access. It darted across my own, exploring dominantly. The sweet taste, I had previously licked from my lips, now filled my whole mouth.

I put my hand on his shoulder, with the intention of pushing him away, but as his fingers continued to trail across my skin, I found myself kissing him back, and pressing him closer to me.

He pulled away, and smiled. His hand now still, although the warmth of it was still sending tingles through my body.

“and when I do,” he continued, “you’ll know that you belong here, with me, and the rest of us.”

Dutch let go of me, and stood up. As he did, I gasped, with ragged breath.

His deep chuckled, was almost a growl from the back of his throat.

“I’m gonna go and find you some clothes, and then you, me and Arthur are gonna go for a little ride.”

He headed towards the exit.

“Dutch?” I called.

He turned to look at me.

“Could you grab me some trousers, I only ever used to wear a skirt when I was working in the saloon!” I smiled.

Dutch chuckled, and rolled his eyes, “now why ain’t that a surprise! I’ll see what I can do!”

He opened the tent flap, shaking his head as he walked out.

I ran my fingers through my hair. What the hell was going on with me. Why was I behaving like this.

Don’t get me wrong, I liked men. But was I really that easy. I was beginning to think maybe I was. One of the reasons me and Billy sometimes worked together, was because we had a little thing going. I thought he liked me, but maybe I was wrong. He didn't come looking for me either.

Would Dutch be the same, drop me like a stone as soon as he got what he wanted.

I wondered if that's what all the women in his camp were. Ex-lovers, who he’d tired of. I suppose at least he hadn’t chucked them out. Or maybe they were the lucky ones, the others he might have chucked out, once they weren't any more use to him.

On the plus side, at least I would get to go home, see my daddy, and then see Eddie, find out why the hell they didn't come looking for me.

Then I could decide, where my future lay.


	9. With friends like those

I sat on the edge of the cot, my legs dangling down, waiting for Dutch to return with some clothes.

It wasn’t as painful this time, when the blood started circulate, which I guessed was a good thing.

I didn't have to wait long before Dutch returned with some clothes. I was thankful, that he had found a pair of trousers, and also what looked to be like my own bra. It looked like it had been washed.

He walked over and placed them on the side of the cot.

We stared at each other for a few moments

“Aren’t you going to get dressed then?” he queried.

I rolled my eyes, “turn around then, I’m not getting dressed with you ogling me,” I retorted.

He smirked, and licked his lips, “Ain’t gonna be seein’ nothing I ain’t seen already!”

I glared at him, “that's because I was unconscious. Either turn around, or get out while I get dressed, I don't want you thinking I’m easy.” I snapped, folding my arms across my chest.

He looked at me and chuckled, “my dear Jesse, you’ve told me to fuck off, called me a bastard, several times.” he hesitated, “oh, and called me a sick fuck. Easy isn’t a term that springs to mind. Feisty, but never easy!”

I stared at him and raised my eyebrows, waiting for him to look elsewhere.

He held his hands up in mock surrender, and turned his back to me, “Satisfied?” he asked.

“Yes,” I huffed, “and by the way, I’m not your girl!”

He chuckled, “we’ll see about that,” he muttered under his breath, but loud enough for me to hear.

I slipped of the shirt I was wearing, and put on my bra, before quickly slipping the shirt back over my head. I then pulled on the trousers, tucking the shirt inside, which was way to big for me.

“You can turn round now.” I concluded.

Dutch turned around, smirking as usual. Why did he have to be so fucking annoying.

“My shirt really suits you,” he quipped smugly.

I sighed, “are we going, or what?”

He opened the tent flap.

“Arthur!” Dutch yelled, “you ready, son?”

Arthur walked over and peered inside. The same annoying smirk appeared on his face.

“Hey Arthur,” Dutch quipped, “Jesse is afraid we’ll think her easy. What do you reckon, son?”

Arthur looked over at me and chuckled, “Stubborn? Probably, a pain in the arse? Definitely, easy?” He shook his head, “hell no, definitely not easy!”

I rolled my eyes, and both men laughed.

Arthur walked over to the cot, “c’mon then princess,” he chuckled.

He quickly lifted me up, carrying me bridle style.

I blushed. Feeling slightly awkward, I wrapped my arms around his neck.

He chuckled, “Don’t worry, I won’t drop you. If I did, Dutch would kill me!”

Arthur carried me over to where the horses were hitched, closely followed by Dutch. As soon as Dutch had mounted his horse, Arthur sat me in front of him. I hardly had a chance to do anything, before I felt his arm wrap around my waist. I gasped and stiffened, as he pressed me close to his chest.

“Relax, Jesse. You’re quite safe,” he insisted.

Safe was a matter of debate. Safe from falling off his horse, yes. But safe from his dubious intentions, that was unlikely. I looked across at Arthur, who was smirking. I wondered if I would be safer with him, but on second thoughts I felt that was highly unlikely.

Instead, I guessed I would have to grin and bear it. Although grinning wasn’t something I was currently doing.

I’m sure that Dutch knew how uncomfortable he was making me feel, and was thoroughly enjoying it.

I was grateful, at least, that the camp wasn't that far away from my home. I was slightly concerned, what I would find there, once we arrived. Had Dutch been right? Was my daddy just using me to bring the money in, so he could sit in an armchair all day drinking?

I guessed I would soon find out.

When we arrived at the house, Dutch didn't attempt to dismount and hitch his horse. Arthur did, however.

He then strode up to the front door, and banged on it loudly with his fist.

I watched at waited. Wondering if after a week without me, whether my daddy would be ok.

The door opened, and there stood my daddy,

“What do you want?” he asked, glaring at Arthur

“Daddy?” I called out.

He looked up shocked, “what the fuck! You’re supposed to be dead!”

Dutch glared at my daddy, “well clearly she isn’t!” he snarled.

Arthur grabbed my daddy by the shirt, “we’ve come for Jesse’s stuff,” he growled.

Your daddy looked at you, then back at Arthur, “I sold it, I can’t live on thin air,” he scoffed.

I choked back a sob, “daddy, why didn't you come and find me?”

He looked at me, “I needed the money, besides, I rented your room out now!”

I stared at him, I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I’d put my life on the line, stolen for him. Anger welled up inside me. I took mama’s ring off my finger.

“You bastard,” I screamed, “I got this back for you, because I thought you were hurting so bad!”

“Give that to me, you little bitch,” he hissed.

I narrowed my eyes, “Not a fucking chance, you don’t deserve it, I wish you’d died instead of mama!”

I lost it at that point, as I felt tears in my eye, and a lump in my throat.

“You’re nothing but drunk!” I sobbed.

I felt Dutch’s grip tighten, “I got you Jesse,” he whispered.

Arthur's gripped tightened on my daddy, and he balled his hand into a fist.

“You better handover the money you got for it then. It belongs to Jesse, not you.” he hissed.

I watched as he pushed my daddy into the house, and kicked the door closed.

I gently slid the ring back on my little finger.

A few minutes ago I would have begged Arthur not to hurt him, but right now I didn't care. My head was on my chest, crying. How could I have been so wrong.

Arthur wasn’t in the house for more than five minutes. He walked out with a face like thunder.

I looked up, as he walked towards me.

“Don’t worry, I didn't hit him, though god knows he deserved it.”

He showed me a bunch of dollars, “c’mon lets try and get some of your stuff back.”

Arthur mounted his horse, and we all headed towards Valentine. I glanced behind at the house, that I used to call home one last time. I felt like my heart had been ripped in two.

I pretty much knew, that I would get the same reaction from Eddie.

To be fair, that wouldn't hurt me as much as my father had.

Our first stop on reaching Valentine was the general store. Arthur figured that's where the clothes would be, my gun would probably be in the gunsmiths.

This time, once the horses were hitched, Dutch jumped off, and then carried me into the store.

Mr Jones the storekeeper, looked shocked. I wasn't sure if he was more shocked to see me being carried, or the fact that I was alive. Maybe it was the bandages on my feet. I couldn’t really tell which.

He grabbed a chair, and brought it from behind the counter.

Dutch put me on chair, and stood next to it, a hand gently resting on my shoulder.

For the first time in a while, I was happy to feel his hands on me.

I was quite surprised at the difference in Arthur's demeanour. With my daddy, he would have quite happily beat him to death, but he was more than polite to Mr Jones. I’m guessing because he didn't think he had done anything wrong.

“I believe Jesse’s daddy, sold her clothes to you?” Arthur asked as he approached the counter.

Mr Jones nodded, “I don't have them all, I’ve sold some.” he replied, nervously.

He looked across at me, “I’m real sorry Jesse. Your daddy said you were dead. Are you ok?”

I nodded, “I was hurt but, these men… My friends helped me.” I replied, looking up at Dutch.

He smiled at me, not the annoying smirk that I hated, but a proper smile.

Mr Jones grabbed the clothes from under the counter, “look just take them,” he said, as Arthur pulled out some money.

Arthur was about to put the money away, but I shook my head, “No Mr Jones, you paid my daddy in good faith, at least let us pay you what you paid my daddy. I don't want you to be out of pocket.” I concluded.

Arthur paid him, and picked up the clothes.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, next stop would be the saloon.

Dutch squeezed my shoulder, “you good, Jesse?” he asked.

I nodded, and put my arm around his neck, as he lifted me up again.

Once Arthur had put the clothes in his saddle bags, we headed for the Saloon.

Eddie was at the other end of the bar, so didn't really notice us, until Dutch sat me on the bar.

“Oi, get that woman off my bar,” Eddie yelled.

I half turned to look at him, “Hello Eddie!” I hissed.

He stopped dead in his tracks, “Jesse!”

Eddie, then clocked Arthur and Dutch. As he did, all the colour drained from his face.

He didn't know whether to come to the bar, or bolt.

Eddie swallowed hard, “I heard you were dead.”

“Who did you hear that from, my daddy? Billy? Why didn't you come looking?” I asked, narrowing my eyes.

“I...err… What do you want anyway?” He stammered.

Arthur walked towards Eddie, “Well how about the money she gave you for the stolen watch, for starters!”

Eddie stared at Arthur, “I… I don’t know what your talking about,” he stuttered.

Arthur leant over the bar, and grabbed Eddie by the shirt, “maybe another broken window, with you on the other side of it will jog your memory!” he snarled.

“Ok… Ok,” Eddie panicked.

Arthur let him go, and he went to the cash register and grabbed twenty dollars.

“That’s what she gave me,” he sighed.

Dutch looked at me, “are we done?” he asked.

“No,” I hissed, I turned to look at Eddie, “where’s my horse. You must have known I’d disappeared, when Honey was still hitched at closing time.”

Eddie swallowed, and licked his lips. “I sold her, payment for the gem!”

Dutch walked over to where Eddie was standing. He held up the ruby on the end of his chain.

“This gem?” he snarled.

Eddie glanced between me and Dutch.

I shook my head, “you sold my fucking horse, what sort of person does that!”

Arthur scowled at Eddie, “pay the lady,” he growled.

Eddie reached into the register, and grabbed another twenty.

“She was worth way more than twenty,” I snarled.

Eddie grabbed another fifty and put it on the counter, “that's all I got,” he hissed.

I narrowed my eyes, “who did you sell her to?”

Eddie smirked, “You’re boyfriend...Billy!”

“Fucking bastard,” I hissed, “where is he?”

Dutch looked at me, frowning, “boyfriend?” he asked.

I nodded, “guess I’m real shit at knowing who to trust.”

“Last I heard, he was headed to Strawberry,” Eddie scowled, “Now fuck off and don’t come back!”

Dutch picked me up and carried me out the saloon. Once outside, he put me on his horse and mounted up behind.

He didn't seem quite as keen to wrap his arm around me. I couldn't really blame him. I wouldn't have blamed him if he’d left me in Valentine with my stuff.

“So, we heading to Strawberry?” Arthur asked.

“No,” I huffed, “once I’m back on my feet, I’ll buy another horse.”


	10. Arthur's Tent

Arthur was about to mount his horse, when someone called his name.

I glanced across, to see a man, who wouldn’t have looked out of place in a theatre.

“Josiah Trelawny!” Arthur exclaimed.

He bowed deeply.

I rolled my eyes, what was a man like that, doing in a town like this.

“and who’s your pretty friend, Dutch?” he asked.

“This is Jesse Maddox, she’s staying with us,” he hesitated, “for a little while.”

I couldn't see the look on Dutch’s face, but I guessed he wasn't smirking. I also guessed that once I was healed, I’d be out on my ear. So much for belonging.

“Josiah Trelawny, at your service miss,” he bowed with a flourish, removing his top hat.

I smiled, “pleased to meet you Mr Trelawny,” I replied.

“What brings you here, Josiah,?” Dutch asked.

Josiah smiled, “I went to Blackwater, looking for you. Although, you’re not very popular, it seems.”

Arthur rolled his eyes, “we left a fair bit of money in Blackwater!”

Josiah chuckled, “and young Sean!”

“Sean?” Dutch questioned, “he’s alive?”

“So it would seem, at least for now. He’s in the hands of some bounty hunters.” Josiah replied.

Dutch looked at Arthur.

“Arthur, take Jesse back to camp, meet me back here with Javier and Charles. I have some business to discuss with Josiah.”

Arthur walked over to Dutch’s horse. I rested my arms on his shoulder, as he lifted me down, then he put me on his own horse.

“you ok riding behind?” Arthur asked.

I nodded, it made a pleasant surprise to be given the choice.

Arthur mounted up, and I put my arms around his waist.

Dutch had already dismounted.

“Meet us in the other saloon, when you come back,” Dutch advised, as he walked away with Josiah Trelawny.

I was slightly disappointed, that he didn't even acknowledge me, or look as we rode away, but at least I knew where I stood now.

Arthur headed out of Valentine, with me clinging onto him. He didn't say much, until we arrived back at camp.

He was about to lift me down, when I stopped him.

“I think it might be best, if I slept somewhere else, don't you?” I suggested.

Arthur frowned, “I wouldn't worry, he’ll get over it.”

I sighed, “He might, but I’m not sure I will. As I’m only gonna be here for a while, its probably better that I don't get too comfortable.” I added.

Arthur shrugged, “If it’ll make you happier, you can stay in my tent. I’ll be gone for a couple of days. I’ll ask Susan to check on your bandages. You should be healed pretty soon.”

I nodded, “Thank you Mr Morgan.”

He chuckled, “Please, call me Arthur. I’ll put you on my cot, and leave your clothes in there as well.”

I nodded. Arthur lifted me down, and carried me to his tent. It was a lot smaller than Dutch’s but I thought it was probably for the best. All things considered.

He put my clothes on the table.

“I have to head off now, with Javier and Charles, but I’ll ask Susan to look in on you.” Arthur confirmed.

I smiled at him, “Thank you Arthur, for everything.”

He smiled back, and headed off.

I lay down on the cot and closed my eyes. I sure did have an innate ability for cocking things up.

I must have been more tired than I thought, because I drifted off to sleep.

I was woken by someone gently shaking my shoulder.

When I opened my eyes, I realised it was the woman from the other night. Dutch had called her Miss Grimshaw, but Arthur had referred to her as Susan.

“Mr Morgan asked me to check your bandages,” she stated, curtly.

I nodded, “yes, thank you, Miss Grimshaw.”

Her expression seemed to soften slightly, “I thought you were staying in Dutch’s tent,” she questioned, as she started to take off the bandages.

I hummed, “well as I’m only staying until my feet are healed enough to walk. Arthur kindly offered me his tent, as he’s not going to be around for a couple of days.”

Miss Grimshaw frowned, “we thought you were staying,” she hesitated, “with Dutch!”

I smiled, “Mr Van Der Linde only wanted it to be temporary, so I felt it wise not to occupy his tent any longer.”

“Oh, I see,” she mumbled. She looked at my feet. “I think we can leave the bandages off now, give it a couple of days and you should be ok to walk.

I nodded, “thanks, then I’ll be out of your way.”

She smiled, “oh you’ve been no trouble, can I get you something to eat?”

I nodded, “Thank you, if its not too much trouble.”

She turned and left, glancing back a couple of times.

It wasn't long before another woman came over with a bowl of stew. I recognised her from before. Mary-Beth. Dutch had asked her to bring some food when I was still tied up.

“Here,” she said, smiling, as she handed me the bowl. “We thought you were…”

“No, Mary-Beth,” I Interrupted, “I’ll be leaving in a couple of days, But thanks for this.”

I started to eat the stew.

Mary-Beth sat on the end of the cot. “You seemed nice,” she continued, “nicer than Molly, anyway,”

I frowned, “Molly?”

Mary-Beth nodded, “she was with Dutch, before they brought you in, and tied you to the post in his tent.”

I rolled my eyes, “figures,” I scoffed.

Mary-Beth moved closer, and her voice lowered to a whisper, “What did you do, I mean, to be tied to a post, you’re not an O’Driscoll, are you?”

I chuckled. I’d heard of the O’Driscoll gang, who in Valentine hadn’t.

“No Mary-Beth, I’m not an O’Driscoll, I just stole Dutch’s ruby and watch.” I admitted.

Mary-Beth gasped, “Not many people steal from Dutch, and get away with it!”

I rolled my eyes, “you mean, and live. What’s so special about that ruby anyway?” I asked.

Mary-Beth looked around, conspiratorially, “I don’t know, only a few people know, but it never leaves his sight,” she whispered.

Mary-Beth stood up, “I better go, or Miss Grimshaw will have my guts.”

I watched as Mary-Beth walked away.

There was some sort of mystery to that ruby, but why should I care. I’d made the right decision. It seemed like Dutch Van Der Linde cast off his girls, like old shoes. How dare he be put out by the fact that I had a boyfriend. If you could call Billy that. More like a partner in crime, with the occasional kiss and snuggle in the corner, if we were lucky. Billy was just as bad as my dad, worse in a way. Well I certainly wouldn't be running to Strawberry to look for him.

I was sorry about Honey though, she was a good horse.

I laid back down on the cot. If things had been different, this place, this gang might have worked out ok. I glanced across at the table. My clothes were in a neat pile, and my boots were underneath it. Also on top of the table was a money clip. The money from my daddy and Eddie. I could use that to make a fresh start. Maybe in Blackwater, or head South to St. Denis.

There was nothing to keep me here now. I reached over and grabbed a pair of trousers and a shirt, discarding the borrowed ones, including Dutch’s, which I had been wearing since I hurt my feet. I’d let Susan Grimshaw have these back in the morning, then I’d see if I could put some weight on my feet. The sooner I was out of here the better.

Arthurs tent was more open than Dutch’s. That said, I still managed to get a good nights sleep. I was woken only by the sun, as it rose, low in the sky.

I opened my eyes and sat up. I glanced over at Dutch’s tent. The flaps were closed. I guessed he returned after I went to sleep. Why was I even bothered. He was probably the most annoying man I had ever met. I really needed to get out of here. After all, out of sight, would be out of mind. I looked at my feet. They were healing, but not fast enough to put my boots on today. Especially if I had to walk into Valentine. I guess I would have to stay put. The last thing I wanted to do was to set my plans back.

I laid back down on the cot. I really didn't need Dutch to emerge from his tent, to see me staring at him. I didn’t want him to think I cared. Even if deep down, I did. In any case, I had some thinking to do. I had to decide what I was going to do after I left the heartlands. I needed to be able to make enough money to support myself. Without resorting to thieving if that was at all possible.

I laid on Arthurs cot for a while, my head resting on my hands. I suppose you could call it daydreaming. I would call it making plans.

A man coughing, brought me out of my thoughts. He stood in the entrance to Arthurs tent.

“I thought you might like something to eat.” he suggested, a bowl of stew in his hand.

I sat up, frowning a little. I thought I recognised him.

He smiled, “I’m Hosea, we met in the saloon, I paid you for the whisky.”

I nodded, “do you always pay for Dutch’s whisky?”

Hosea chuckled, “only when he’s behaving like an idiot.”

I hummed, as he handed me the stew.

“May I sit?” He asked,

I nodded, and moved my legs, so I sat cross legged on the cot.

“I hope you don’t mind me asking, but did you and Dutch fall out?” he asked.

I smiled, and scratched my head, “you could say that, I’ve had my fill of people who say one thing, and mean something else.”

“Ahh,” Hosea replied. “Dutch is...well he’s a complex character.”

I hummed. “I think I’ve had enough of complex characters,” I concluded.

Hosea grinned, “your boyfriend? Will you go and find him?”

I laughed, “No Hosea, like most men, he is an idiot! No offence!”

Hosea smiled, “non taken. What will you do?”

I rolled my eyes, “is that you asking, or Dutch?”

Hosea stood up and chuckled, “He’s right, you’re a very clever girl.”

“Shame he didn't realise that before he started behaving like a prize idiot,” I chided.

I glanced over to Dutch’s tent, he was watching.

“You can tell him that, as well!” I added.

“Enjoy your food,” Hosea concluded. He walked back over to where Dutch was standing.

I really hoped Hosea told him what I’d said. Seriously, could the man not come and ask me himself.

Well it was too late now. I sat and finished my stew. Maybe I could ask Hosea to take me to the stables in Valentine, when I was ready to leave. At least then I could buy a new horse.


	11. A Bastard

I had never been one for sitting around doing nothing. There’s only so much thinking you can do. I looked at my feet, and made a decision. If I was going to leave anytime soon, I was gonna have to grit my teeth and deal with the pain.

I dropped my legs over the side of the cot, and placed my feet on the ground. Using the cot to balance me, I stood up. I gritted my teeth, and hissed as pain engulfed my feet. I took one step. It felt like a thousand needles burning through my feet. But I knew, if I wanted to leave I would just have to put up with it.

I grabbed my boots and sat back down. Thankfully none of the cuts had reopened.

Any hope that wearing my boots would alleviate some of the pain, was soon dashed. I would just have to put up with it.

I walked gingerly, out into the main area of the camp, limping with every step. Beads of sweat starting forming on my forehead, but I just wiped them away.

As I walked over to the main campfire, and an overturned log, which acted as a seat, Mary-Beth came running over.

“You shouldn’t be walking around yet, you need to give your feet a chance to heal.” she scolded.

She offered me her shoulder for support, which I happily accepted.

“I don't have time for that,” I gasped, my breath somewhat ragged. “As soon as Arthur comes back, I need to leave.” 

As if on queue, we both looked up as several horses arrived back in camp.

I recognised Arthur. There were also two other riders. One of them had another man, riding behind.

I guessed that Arthur had overestimated the length of time he would be away. I couldn't expect him to let me have his bed, now he had returned.

Mary-Beth frowned, “just stay here,” she insisted.

I nodded, truth be told, I felt a bit sick, and I had only walked a few yards.

I watched as the four men, walked into camp, then saw Dutch walk over to them, smiling. I guessed that one of the men, must be Sean. Not that it mattered now, I really needed to be gone. Maybe I could persuade Arthur, to give me a ride into town. I could stay in the hotel tonight. Then sort out a new horse in the morning.

I still hadn’t decided where to go, but Arthur's early return, had kind of forced my hand.

I watched as Mary-Beth walked over to Arthur. I rolled my eyes, I wonder what she was saying. Something along the lines that I shouldn’t be walking around, I didn't doubt.

Seeing him look over and stare at me, I knew I was probably about to get a lecture.

Before I could worry about that, I heard the dulcet tones of an Irish accent

“Well, what do we have here, a pretty new addition to Dutch’s gang? Sean Maguire, at your service ma’am,” The young man chirped, as he remove his green bowler hat.

I looked up to see a man, with a shock of red hair, his green eyes, twinkling.

“Just call me Jesse, but I’m leaving soon,” I replied, smiling.

Sean frowned, “was it somethin’ I said?”

“More than likely, “Arthur drawled as he walked up behind him, “But you ain't goin’ nowhere, Jesse, and what the hell are you doing walking about.”

I rolled my eyes, “I have to start walking about at some point, besides staring at the walls of your tent is as boring as hell,” I retorted.

Arthur walked over to me, and sat next to me on the log.

“C’mon, give me them boots,” he demanded, as he grabbed hold of my ankle.

“Oi, what the hell.” I hissed.

Arthur didn't let go, and proceeded to try and pull the boot off my foot.

“Alright, alright, let me do it.” I grumbled.

I pulled off my boots, and passed them to Arthur.

“I’ll take you back to my tent, when you’re ready.” Arthur stated.

I looked at Arthur, and shook my head. “I ain't sleeping in your cot, not now you’re back!”I insisted.

“Yeah you are,” he smirked, “I’ll just sleep on a bedroll, I do it enough when I’m away from camp.”

I rolled my eyes at him. There seemed little point in arguing. Instead I looked at my feet. They were a little bit red and swollen, but at least none of the wounds had reopened. For that I was grateful. He probably had a point. I should have let them heal properly.

I watched as he walked back to his tent, with my boots in his hand. I sighed, why did the men around here have to be so bossy.

“Well,” Sean started, “as it looks like your staying, lets start the party, he grabbed a beer and handed it to me.

“Thank you, Mr Maguire,” I chirped

Sean smiled at me, eyes twinkling, “Oh call me Sean, sweetheart. I want to know everything about ya. First how did you come to be here?”

I chuckled, “well Mr Maguire...Sean, that is a very long story.”

Sean chuckled, “Don’t worry, we’ve got all night!”

Several other gang members soon gathered around the fire, Javier Escuella, Charles Smith, John Marston, who I recognised from the Saloon, Abigail, Karen, Mary-Beth and Tilly. All gathered around to hear the story.

“So where should I start,” I quipped, “Ahh I know. I met Dutch, Hosea and Arthur in the saloon in Valentine, when me and my boyfriend stole Dutch’s pocket watch and ruby!”

There was a gasp, from my audience.

“You are a brave thief, chica!” Javier commented, smiling at me.

I chuckled, “brave or foolhardy,” I replied.

I hummed, and tossed the empty bottle aside, “I think I need another drink!”

Sean scuttled off, and returned with a bottle of whisky.

After a couple of swallows I continued.

“I distracted him, with my low-cut dress, then my partner pretended to molest me, I knocked into him, and slipped the goods into my partners pocket. The saloon owner pulled him off, and chucked him out. Job done,” I said, smugly.

Everyone was chuckling. Everyone that is except for Dutch. He didn't look very happy.

“What happened next?” Karen asked.

I gulped back some more of the whisky, I was becoming a little light headed.

I chuckled, “kinda went down hill from there, I fenced the watch, and somehow Dutch and Arthur found out, my boyfriend squealed like a girl,” I giggled. “Then Dutch and Arthur, kidnapped me!”

“Is that how you hurt your feet?” Tilly asked.

“Ooh no!” I slurred, “I did that when I tried to escape!”

I tipped the bottle I was holding, upside down, “oh dear, its empty!” I chirped.

Karen stood up, “I can soon fix that!” she chuckled.

I looked over towards Dutch’s tent, he wasn't listening anymore, instead he had started the gramophone and was dancing with Susan. Arthur was also dancing, but had managed to way lay Karen, whilst she was fetching my bottle.

“How come Dutch isn’t dancing with Molly?” I whispered to Mary-Beth.

She chuckled, “Oh Molly isn’t very happy with Dutch, not since you...well you know.”

I laughed, “finally he’s learning he can’t have his cake and eat it!”

Karen finally returned with another bottle, which she handed to me.

I quickly took a couple of swallows, “now,” I slurred, “where was I.”

“You escaped, chica!” Javier reminded me.

I chuckled, “yes, after being tied to a post, in Dutch's tent for a week he untied me… well mostly, anyway I escaped, but I had no shoes, so I cut my feet to ribbons, but Arthur and Dutch came after me, and brought me back.”

I gulped down a couple more swallows of whisky.

“I was gonna stay, but I’ve discovered all men are bastards!” I shouted, towards where Dutch was standing.

I looked at Sean and Javier, “no offence!”

They both laughed, “none taken, chica!” Javier replied.

I leant my head on Sean’s shoulder, “are you a bastard Sean?” I slurred, my eyes half closing.

“Yes he is,” Karen replied.

“No!” Sean insisted, “Karen I love ya!”

Karen rolled her eyes, “only when you’re drunk,” she hissed.

I felt some arms around my waist, “I’ll take it from here Mr Maguire,” Dutch said, as he lifted me up.

“You’re a bastard Dutch Van Der Linde,” I slurred, as he carried me, bridal style, across the camp.

He chuckled, “Yes I know, Miss Maddox, and you’re drunk.

Dutch carried me into his tent, and laid me on his cot.

I stared at him, “But tomorrow, I’ll be sober, but you’ll still be a bastard!”

He bit his bottom lip and shook his head, as he sat next to me on the cot.

I felt his hand touch my face, as he gently caressed my cheek.

“There’s something about you, Jesse Maddox,” he cooed.

“Don't think you can get round me Dutch Van Der Linde,” I scolded, poking him in the chest with my finger, “I’m not sleeping in your tent tonight.”

Dutch chuckled, “of course your not!”

His lips touched mine, in a gentle kiss. I kissed him back, as he continued to stroke my cheek.

When our lips finally parted, I ran my tongue across my lips, savouring his taste.

“You’re still a bastard,” I slurred.

He hummed, “yes, I know.” he chuckled.

I closed my eyes, unable to keep them open any longer, and slowly drifted off to sleep.


	12. Hungover

I only vaguely remembered what happened the previous night. Dutch carrying me to his tent. laying me on his cot, and kissing me.

Hindsight is a wonderful thing. I realised now I shouldn’t have had so much to drink, and ended up getting so drunk. If I hadn’t I wouldn’t have ended up spending the night in Dutch’s cot.

I groaned, my head hurt.

“hungover? Sweetheart,” Dutch chuckled.

I was laying on my front, face buried in the pillow, it wasn’t really helping my throbbing head. I’d also realised my trousers were gone, I only had on my knickers and one of Dutch’s shirts.

“What the hell, Dutch? Where are my clothes? And what am I doing in your cot?” I groaned, turning my face to look at him.

He was on his side, half sitting, his chin resting on his hand, gazing at me.

“I like you in my clothes,” he smirked, “besides, yours are a little...disgusting!”

He pointed to a piled of discarded clothes in the corner. Most of them covered in...sick.

Oh god, how embarrassing.

I felt my face flush, “I’m sorry,” I mumbled, burying my face back in the pillow.

I felt his hand slide up the back of the shirt, as he gentle rubbed circles on my back.

I moan escaped my lips, which was nothing to do with the hangover. His warm fingers sending tingles through my body.

“First hangover is it?” he soothed.

I nodded and groaned acknowledgement.

Dutch grunted a chuckle, “I hope you don't intend to make a habit of this?”

I turned my head to look at him, “why are you being so nice,” I mumbled.

He frowned at me, but there was a hint of a smile on his face.

“Maybe,” he whispered, “its because I like you, Jesse!”

I rolled my eyes, “I thought you wanted me gone, that my stay was only temporary.”

Dutch looked at me and shook his head, his lips gently touched my temple.

“try and get some rest, I’ll ask Arthur to fetch your clothes across.”

I closed my eyes, and I felt his hand move away from my back. Slightly disappointed, at the lack of his touch.

When I opened my eyes, he was halfway across the tent.

“Wait,” I mumbled. “You wanted me to leave!”

He turned to look at me, and chuckled, “No, Jesse. I want you in here, with me.”

I rolled over onto my back, and attempted to sit, but a wave of nausea passed over me, so I lay back down.

“What about Molly?” I asked, hesitantly.

Dutch looked at me and rolled his eyes, “you don't want to listen to everything you hear around the camp, Molly and me have been over for a long time, it just wasn't common knowledge.”

I shook my head, “do I even get a choice?”

Dutch stared at me, a dark look in his eyes. He slowly ran his tongue over his lips.

“Not really,” he smirked, as turned and headed out of the tent.

I sighed, and closed my eyes. He might be able to keep me in his tent. He might even be able to stop me from leaving. But if he thought for one minute, I was going to be his next amorous conquest, he had another think coming!

When you get really blind drunk, the sleep you have doesn't make you less tired. That was the case for me. Although I spent last night on a comfortable cot in Dutch’s tent, it wasn't really sleep. More an alcohol induced unconsciousness.

When I drifted off to sleep again, it was a proper sleep. I was somewhat exhausted, and probably shocked, that I was now more or less Dutch Van Der Linde’s prisoner. I would say hostage, but there was no ransom and no chance of anyone paying it, even if there was.

My only hope was to make him hate me enough to evict me from the camp.

Since I had been here, I had seen no sign of Molly. I wondered if for some reason, she had been told to leave, or was free to do so, when Dutch had no use for her anymore.

I was beginning to think that his ex lovers either left, or were asked to leave. Once I was up and about, I would talk to Mary-Beth. She seemed to be quite happy to gossip about the members of the gang. I didn't think for one minute, that she, Tilly or Karen were ex lovers of Dutch. I could of course be wrong.

It also appeared to me, that Dutch was the jealous type. When we were in Valentine, he appeared to be really into me. That was until he heard that Billy was my boyfriend. Maybe I could use that to my advantage.

When I woke for the second time, the pile of vomit ridden clothes had been removed. My clothes, that had been in Arthur's tent were neatly folded on a chair. My boots tucked underneath the chair.

The money clip, however, was nowhere to be seen. It wasn't a huge surprise, after all I was in a camp full of outlaws. Even if one of them hadn’t ferreted it away for themselves, I doubted that Dutch would let me have it. Just in case I tried to make a bid for freedom. Freedom was all well and good, but wouldn’t put food in your belly. Of course the other alternative, was to bide my time. Wait for everything to heal, then steal from the outlaws and then try and escape. I just had to be sure to keep Dutch’s amorous intentions at bay, in the meantime.

I sat up, and swung my legs over the side of the cot. I winced as I stood up. My feet were still sore. To be fair, even if I could have left today, it would have been tricky. I still needed time to allow everything to heal.

I limped across to the other side of the tent, and grabbed some clean clothes. I left Dutch’s shirt on the bed. It made a good nightshirt. If he didn't decide to take it back, I might use it for that at least.

Carefully slipping my feet into my boots, I limped out of the tent.

Arthur and Hosea, where sitting at a table, so I limped across to join them.

Arthur chuckled, “you feeling better?”

I sat down, “not really,” I admitted, “but I figured the fresh air would do me good.”

“As long as you don't try and leave, I guess fresh air is a good idea,” he added.

I rolled my eyes, “I know, don't worry. I realise I’m a prisoner here. Just grateful He didn't decide to tie me up again!”

Hosea frowned, “Prisoner, that's a bit strong, don’t you think?”

I sighed, “when you’re forced to stay somewhere, whether you want to or not, you’re still a prisoner,” I scoffed.

I glanced around the camp, and saw Javier sitting by the fire.

I stood up, and started to head across.

“Where you going now?” Arthur asked, “you shouldn't walk about too much, not with your feet ‘n all.”

I looked over my shoulder, and smirked, “Don’t worry Arthur, I’m just gonna be sociable. I thought I sit with Javier for a while.”

Arthur frowned, “I don’t suppose Dutch’ll be very happy about that.”

I chuckled, “unlucky for Dutch. Just because I can’t leave, doesn’t mean I can’t have a little fun!”

I limped across to the fire, chuckling to myself. Time to get my flirty head on!

Javier was sitting on the log, where I had sat the previous night. I limped over and sat next to him.

He looked at me and smiled.

“How does it feel to be Dutch’s new woman, chica?” he asked.

I frowned, “I’m not anyone’s woman, Javier. I’m a free agent.”

I put my hand on Javier’s thigh, more to prove a point than anything.

Javier chuckled, “I think you need to tell Dutch that, then.”

He moved my hand off his thigh, and looked across the camp.

I followed his gaze and saw Dutch striding towards me, with a face like thunder.

Ahh shit, I thought, as I saw the look on his face. This doesn’t look like its gonna end well, at least not for me.


	13. Murder

I hate being right. I thought perhaps he would hit me or tie me up. But I didn't know the man that well. As it transpired he did neither. What he did would make me wish I’d never met him, or stolen his precious fucking ruby.

Dutch walked across to where I was sitting. My heart had started to thud hard against my chest. I swallowed hard, and took a deep breath, waiting for the onslaught which never came. He never even raised his voice. Instead he gave me a cold stare, as he folded his arms across his chest.

“Fine,” he hissed, “you can leave!”

He reached into his coat pocket and pulled out the money clip, holding it out to me.

I hesitantly reached out to take it, expecting some trick or other, but there was none.

I shoved the money in the pocket of my jeans.

“What about my clothes?” I asked, cautiously.

Dutch stared at me, then called out, his eye contact remaining solid.

“Arthur, please put Miss Maddox’s clothes into a saddle bag,” he commanded.

Now I knew he was pissed. It was always Jesse this, or Jesse that. The only time he called me Miss Maddox, was when he was about to do something awful.

Maybe he was gonna shoot me in the back.

I watched as Arthur went into Dutch’s tent, then quickly came out with a saddlebag.

“Arthur, please take Miss Maddox to Valentine.” Dutch ordered.

Then he turned and walked away from me, no goodbye or good luck.

I shouldn’t have been surprised. As I thought, he found his lovers and he threw them away. I was grateful that it had never got that far with him. He was indeed, a bastard.

Arthur glanced at Dutch, as he walked away, then he looked at me.

“C’mon, I’ll drop you at the railway station.”

I nodded. Just before I followed him, I looked over at Javier.

“Good luck, Javier. Say goodbye to the others for me,” I asked, a little sadly.

Javier nodded, and waved.

I would miss some of the others. Javier, Sean, Mary-Beth. They seemed like good people, even if they were outlaws. 

Arthur helped me onto his horse, and he rode down the track. I glanced behind me, watching as the camp disappeared from view.

“It’s what you wanted, ain’t it?” Arthur questioned.

I sighed, “Yeah, I guess so.”

I looked at Arthur shook his head. I couldn't see the expression on his face, but I could imagine it.

I could have stayed, and become Dutch’s woman. Staying as anything else wasn’t really and option, well not for Dutch, or for me, come to think of it.

I clung onto Arthur's jacket, not really wanting to put my arms around his waist.

The short ride to Valentine, was made in silence. There wasn't really much to say. Arthur probably thought I was stupid, and stubborn. The gang were allegedly looking for freedom, but Dutch been only to quick to want to take mine. Double standards, hypocritical and a bastard to boot. So why was I feeling so empty.

When we reached the station, I dismounted, without any help. I slightly regretted that, as I winced when my feet hit the ground.

“They still ain’t properly healed, are they?” Arthur queried, as he handed me the saddlebag of clothes.

I shrugged, “Thanks for the ride.”

Arthur looked at me, and slightly rolled his eyes, “look after yourself, and don't do anything stupid!”

I smiled back at him, “I’ll try not to.”

I limped towards the town, I would buy myself a gun, stay over in the hotel, then decide in the morning, where I was headed.

First stop was the gunsmith. It took me a while to get there. Arthur had been right, my feet weren't healed yet, and I had to walk from the station.

I’m not sure if Arthur was expecting me to catch a train, I guessed if I had asked him, he would have taken me into Valentine, it was too late now.

I smiled as I walked into the shop, but the gunsmith just gave me a dirty look. Most likely he had witnessed the scene when I was last in town, with Dutch and Arthur.

“Do you still have my gun?” I asked testily.

The gunsmith grunted an acknowledgement, and placed it on the counter.

“Its forty dollars if you want it.” he growled.

I quickly placed the money on the counter, adding enough for a holster and a box of bullets as well.

I didn't hang about. I kind of figured that I wasn't going to be made very welcome in Valentine, so I headed towards the hotel.

The reception at the hotel was a little different. After all business was business, so I took a room and a bath. I hadn’t had a bath in ages, so this was somewhat of a luxury. It definitely eased my poor feet.

Once I’d finished with the bath, I went to the room, and just relaxed on the bed. Trying to decide what my best course of action would be. Look for honest work, or keep on thieving. After the last encounter, I kind of wanted to give thieving a miss. I certainly didn't want to run into anymore people like Dutch Van Der Linde. Having said that, I could make more money on one hit thieving, than I could in a week of working.

Guess it was another thing to sleep on, along with which direction I should head in.

The following morning, I came down the stairs of the hotel, still undecided about the direction I should travel. The Hotel manager gave me a funny look, but I just shrugged it off. My feet were a lot less sore, thanks to the bath.

I stepped out the hotel. I figured I’d visit the small saloon for breakfast, they always had oatmeal on the menu.

As I crossed the street, I heard someone call my name.

“Miss Maddox, Miss Jesse Maddox?”

I looked over to see two men on horseback, I didn't recognise them.

“Who wants to know?” I asked, suspiciously.

No sooner had the words left my lips then one of the men pulled a gun.

“I’m bounty hunter, and I’m taking you in,” he hissed.

I shook my head, “You’ve got the wrong person, I ain't done anything wrong.”

The other rider dismounted, he was carrying a rifle.

“Don’t try anything stupid he warned.” Pointing the rifle at me.

I put my hands up, but Arthur's words echoed in my mind

_Look after yourself, and don't do anything stupid!_

Surely Arthur didn't know something. No that was a stupid thought.

“What am I have supposed to have done?” I asked.

The bounty hunter with the rifle walked towards me, “Murder! You killed your boyfriend, Billy Rose.”

I stared at him in disbelief, “Billy’s dead?” I questioned.

He rolled his eyes, “like you don't know,” he scoffed.

I shook my head, “It wasn't me, I’ve been...” I stopped, midway through the sentence, they wouldn’t believe me, if I told them.

“Sure!” He hissed, you were somewhere else, only you weren't ‘cause they’ve got a witness who saw ya!”

Before I could say anything, or think about what he had just said, I felt the butt of his rifle hit me in the face.

My knees buckled, as I tasted blood. Just before everything went black, I heard his voice,

“C’mon, lets take her in. there's a rope with her name on it!” he laughed.

When I woke up, my jaw was throbbing. I gently rubbed it. It was swollen. I could only hope it was bruised, and not broken.

Seems like bounty hunters weren't averse to hitting women.

I opened my eyes and looked around. I was laying on a cot, in a room, mostly bars. There was one wall, with a barred window. Only it wasn't really a window, as it had no glass. It must have still been daylight, as there was light filtering through.

I sat up, and swung my legs over the side of the cot. I looked around the small room. It looked like a cell in a jailhouse. Not that I’d ever been in one before.

I walked over to the window and looked out. Some hick of a town, not Valentine though. I walked over to the door of the cell

“Hey!” I yelled.

It looked like the cell was in some sort of basement, as there were stairs leading up.

I heard a door open, and someone came down the stairs. He looked like a sheriff.

“Look, there's been a big mistake, I haven't done anything!” I yelled.

The man rolled his eyes. “You were seen, we got a witness!”

“Who, because whoever it is they’re lying! Where the hell am I anyway?”

The sheriff looked at you and shook his head.

“You’re in the Strawberry Jail, for the murder of Billy Rose, your ex-boyfriend. A falling out among thieves, I’m led to believe. A Mr Bell saw you kill him, and run. We’re just waiting for the Marshall to sign the paperwork, then you’ll be hung.”

I stared at the sheriff in horror. “He’s lying, I don't know why, or who he is, but I’ve never been to Strawberry before!”

The Sheriff chuckled, as he turned to walk away. “Sure, that’s what they all say!”

I walked back to the cot, and sat down. Holding my head in my hands. This was it then, someone had killed Billy, then told the law it was me.

A thought crossed my mind, not many people knew that Billy had come here, Eddie knew, he told me when…

I put two and two together. “Fucking Morgan and Van Der Linde!” I snarled.

The bastards had set me up!


	14. A Hanging

I was fucked, that was the long and the short of it. Stuck in jail in Strawberry, for a crime I didn't commit.

Somehow, Dutch had arranged to kill Billy, and then got someone to frame me for it. All because I didn't want to be his next conquest.

Then there was Arthur, he was complicit somehow. Probably came here, straight after he’d dropped me in Valentine. Unless they’d set it up before. What better way to keep someone in a gang of outlaws, than to put a bounty on their head.

I looked across at the cell door. One of the deputies had brought me some food and water. No point trying to starve my self to death. I walked over and picked it up. At least it looked edible. Not rotten or crawling with maggots.

I wondered if I’d get offered a choice of food, before they hung me. I’d heard rumours that's what they did, before you were hung.

I sat on the cot, my legs crossed eating the food, there was little else to do.

I looked towards the barred window, the sun was beginning set. Guess that was gonna be my life for the next few days just eating and sleeping.

I chucked the empty metal bowl and cup towards the cell door, and lay down on the cot.

I’d only just closed my eyes, when I heard someone calling my name.

“Jesse, Jesse over here.”

I recognised the voice immediately, I ran over to the barred window. There he was, Arthur fucking Morgan, and some other ugly bastard.

“You fucking bastard!” I hissed.

“Ooh she’s a feisty one, ain’t she, Morgan,” the other man smirked.

He had longish blond hair, and a horseshoe moustache.

“Shut up Micah, you’re not helping!” Arthur hissed, glaring at the other man.

Micah shrugged.

“Listen, Jesse. I’m...we’re here to get you out.” Arthur explained.

I narrowed my eyes, “Why, you’re the one who got me in here!”

Micah took a step closer to the cell window.

“Technically, that would be me, princess, but I was following orders!”

“Dutch!” I snarled.

I glared at the two men, “You do know they’re gonna hang me!” I hissed.

“Not if we get you out, Jesse.” Arthur began, “but if we do, you have to come back to the camp, and join the gang.”

I stared at Arthur in disbelief, and grabbed the bars on the window.

“You’re fucking kidding me! He set me up, just so I’ll come back?” I snarled.

Arthur nodded, “that's about it. You’ll already have a bounty on ya, so it makes sense.”

I shook my head, “No! You go and tell that piece of shit, I’d rather hang than go anywhere near him again. I hope he rots in hell!” I hissed.

Arthur sighed. “C’mon Jesse, be sensible. They’re gonna hang you.”

“Yeah, they are, and I’d be hung ten times over, rather than spend another second in the company of that old bastard. You go and tell him that!” I growled.

“C’mon, Morgan. We’re done here, lets go tell the old man.” Micah grumbled.

I turned my back on the pair of them, then stopped. I turned back, as I watched them walk away.

“I’m not done, you lot better watch your backs!” I yelled.

The two men stopped in their tracks, and turned.

“Whadya mean by that?” Arthur hissed.

I sneered at them, “I’m not the only one with a bounty on my head. You go back and tell your glorious leader that, arsehole!”

I turned away from the window, and headed back to the cot.

Neither men came back to the window. I felt that I’d cut my nose off to spite my face. I was so angry, to think he’d set me up, just like that. After telling me he liked me. Probably not that much then.

I could wait till the Marshall got here, then see if I could cut a deal. Tell him where the Van Der Linde gang was camped out, in exchange for my freedom.

Seemed to me like every man that entered my life only let me down, or betrayed me. First my daddy, then Eddie and Billy. As soon as I started to trust Dutch and Arthur, they did exactly the same thing.

I closed my eyes, I had no more tears left to cry. Time to harden up, and start looking after number one.

As the sun went down, the jail cell was left in complete darkness, making it easier to drift off to sleep, which I duly did.

I awoke the next morning, to the sound of a metal plate being shoved across the floor.

When I opened my eyes, the deputy was standing there, staring at me.

“Breakfast, enjoy it!” he grumbled.

I looked down at the plate. Steak! What the hell was going on!

“What’s this?” I asked, a little surprised.

He rolled his eyes. “Last meal, you hang at noon!”

I stared at the plate, and then at the deputy.

“What about the Marshall? I need to talk to him!” I squealed.

The deputy looked at me and laughed, “He don’t make deals with murderers, no matter what information you might have. He rode in first thing, did the paperwork and left.”

I watched as he headed up the stairs.

I got up from the cot, and grabbed the plate. So this was it. In a few hours I’d be dead. All this because of some god-damn ruby. Or more because of the fact that it belonged to an arsehole.

I took a bite of the steak. It was as tough as an old leather boot. Suddenly, I wasn't particularly hungry. I walked back over to the cot and lay down. Now it was just a case of waiting for the hour of my fate to arrive.

Time seemed to drag, which wasn’t really a surprise. Eventually I saw the sheriff and the deputy coming down the stairs, and heading towards the cell.

The sheriff, pull out a gun.

“Turn around, hands in the air!” he commanded.

I did as he asked. There was no point doing anything else. I’d just end up getting shot, which I figured would likely be a lot more painful than being hung.

I felt deputy grab my wrists, and tied them tightly with some rope. Once they were tied, he roughly pushed me towards the cell door.

“Alright, arsehole,” I hissed, “there's no need for that!”

The sheriff, who had already holstered his gun, grabbed my arm and marched me up the steps, then out into the street.

A crowd was already gathering, as he marched me to the scaffold. My heart was now beating out of my chest, but I was determined to meet my fate with some dignity.

The sheriff guided me up the steps. He offered to put a hood over my head, but I shook my head. I was gonna leave this world with my eyes open.

He put the noose around my neck, then tightened the knot.

I glared at him, “Don’t I get a priest?” I asked.

He scowled at me, “bit late for that, after what you did, you’re going to hell anyway.”

I rolled my eyes. Little point in delaying the inevitable.

“C’mon on then,” I hissed, “lets get this over with!”

He walked over to the lever, he started going on about what a terrible person I was, and what a terrible crime I had committed. I zoned out slightly, just waiting. I was probably more scared than I tried to make out, as I felt my trousers go damp. My face flushed slightly at the realisation that I’d just peed myself. The crowd were too busy listening to the spiel of the sheriff to notice.

Finally silence, except for the sound of the lever being pulled.

The intention of leaving this world with my eyes open, failed. As soon as I felt myself falling I screwed my eyes shut. But it didn't stop me from hearing gunshots, and instead of the rope coming to a sharp stop, I carried on falling until I hit the ground with a thud.

Pain shot through me. No-ones body is designed to hit the ground from that distance. I could still hear a lot of shooting, and screaming as the audience for the hanging ran for cover.

I just lay there groaning, not able to move as any attempt seemed to cause me agony.

Finally the gunshots and screaming stopped. I just lay there, until I heard a voice I recognised.

“I don’t care how much you hate me Jesse, I wasn’t about to let you hang.”


	15. Back where I started

I turned my head, in the direction of the voice. I didn't need to open my eyes to see who it was, I could smell his scent. The expensive cologne, the cigars, the hint of brandy on his breath. I opened my eyes none the less. I was in too much pain to glare.

“You fucking arsehole,” I hissed.

I winced, even the effort of talking was painful. I closed my eyes again.

I felt the ropes being cut from my wrists. Then his arm slid gently under my back.

“I’m gonna lift you up in a minute,” Dutch whispered, “it might hurt a little.”

I really wanted to tell him to take his fucking hands off me, but it hurt too much. If someone had offered me a bullet there and then, I would have taken it.

“Is she OK?” Arthur asked.

“I don’t know son, that was a long drop.” Dutch replied.

Then I was being picked up.

I groaned then let out a whimper. I couldn’t even tell where the pain was. It seemed to be everywhere. My breaths came in ragged gasps. Each breath was painful.

“Hurry up you two, they’ll be more law along in a minute!” Micah growled.

His voice sounded distant. In fact everything sounded distant as I passed out into blissful oblivion.

When I came to, the pain wasn’t any less, and there was a cacophony of voices. Some male, some female.

I opened my eyes, to find myself in a place I recognised only too well. Dutch’s tent.

The hand that was stroking my forehead, I recognised as well.

“Get your hand off me, you piece of shit!” I groaned.

Dutch removed his hand from my head.

“I think it would be best if you and Arthur, made yourselves scarce!” Susan growled.

I closed my eyes again.

“Jesse, sweetheart, I need you to open your eyes, stay with us.” Hosea whispered.

I opened my eyes, to find everyone had gone, except Hosea and Susan.

I felt Hosea’s hands running over my body.

“what...” I began, but winced.

“I’m just checking that nothing’s broken, I’m sorry,” Hose announced, apologetically.

I was glad it was Hosea, and not Dutch. Dutch would have been enjoying it too much.

“Don't try and talk, honey,” Susan soothed, “not for a while.”

I nodded. Not wanting the pain to get any worse.

Hosea finally stopped his examination.

“You have a couple of broken ribs. Drink this, it’ll help with the pain, but it might make you a bit drowsy,” Hosea said, as he tilted my head, and put a cup to my mouth.

I drank the liquid, and closed my eyes. “don't let that bastard anywhere near me,” I mumbled.

I heard Hosea chuckle, just before a drifted into a pain free sleep.

Unfortunately Hosea didn’t heed my request. Either that or Dutch was adamant he was gonna play nurse maid. The fact that he put me in his tent, meant it was probably the latter.

In any case, when I awoke, he was there, gently stroking my hair.

“Why are you here,” I groaned, not looking at him.

He tilted his head on one side, “just making sure you’re OK, what happened to your face?” he asked, gently touching my jaw.

That was probably the only part of me that hurt less than anywhere else.

“Bounty hunters don’t send out hand written invitations,” I hissed, sarcastically, “this particular one favours the butt of his rifle!”

Dutch’s eyes darkened, “I’ll find the son of bitch and I’ll kill him,” he hissed.

I rolled my eyes, “For fuck sake, Dutch! What did you expect!” I growled.

Dutch took my hand, “listen to me Jesse, I...”

I pulled my hand away, and winced at the sudden movement.

“Save it, Dutch! You did this, just fucking take a look at your handwork,” I yelled, my voice cracking. Tears beginning to pool in my eyes.

Dutch stood up, his back to me, I heard him sigh. Then he turned around, and crouched down at the edge of the cot.

He grabbed my hand, firmly this time, so I couldn’t pull it away, and pressed his lips to it in a gentle kiss.

“Jesse, I know I shouldn't have done what I did, but you make me crazy, when I heard that Billy was your boyfriend, when I saw you flirting with Javier. Even when you rested your head on Sean’s shoulder.” He hesitated, as he leant over and his hand cupped my face, his thumb moving gently back and forth on my cheek.

“I want you Jesse, I need you to be mine,” he whispered. His lips gently brushed mine.

I stared at him, in disbelief.

“What gives you the right to decide, who I should be with. You’re such a hypocrite, you preach freedom, but then want to take mine a way!” I hissed.

Dutch stood up, and raked his fingers through his hair.

He turned around and silently left the tent.

A few moments later, Hosea came in. I guessed he had heard, if not everything, then likely the raised voices.

I stared at him, I knew they were friends, but surely not even Hosea could defend his behaviour.

“Why, Hosea? Why did he do it?” I demanded.

Hosea smiled, as he sat on the edge of the cot.

“Because he’s an idiot, because he cares for you a lot. I’ve not seen him like this since...” His voice trailed off.

“Since what?” I asked, frowning.

Hosea shook his head, “That should come from him,” he hesitated, thinking for a moment.

“You should ask him about the ruby!” He added.

I sighed, “I’ve asked him before, about it, he wouldn’t say!”

Hosea smiled, “well ask him now, he’s probably ready to tell you now!”

I frowned. After Dutch’s little confession, I wasn't sure I wanted to know.

Hosea pulled a jar out of his pocket, and put it on the side.

“What's that?” I asked, curiously.

“It’s for your bruises, to help them heal, your back is worse. Someone will come and put it on.” He replied, smiling.

I looked under the blanket, realising I was naked. I remembered at the scaffold, peeing myself. My face flushed with embarrassment, at the memory.

Hosea rested his hand on my arm. “Susan has your clothes, she’s getting them washed. Its nothing to be ashamed of Jesse. I’ve seen grown men at the scaffold do the same.” He soothed.

I looked at the jar on the side, “Who’s gonna put that on?” I asked, my cheeks still flushed.

Hosea smiled, knowingly.

“Oh no, you can’t be serious!” I exclaimed.

Hosea stood up, “I know you and Dutch had started to get close, before all this kicked off. Just give him a chance, Jesse.”

I rolled my eyes, “You would say that, you’ll always take his side,” I grumbled.

Hosea shook his head, “No, not always. But I think that you and he...Well I think you could be good for each other.”

I watched as Hosea walked out the tent, so much for not letting him anywhere near me!


	16. Fate

I stared at the tub of salve that Hosea had left on the side. I really couldn't believe that he was expecting me to allow Dutch, the man that had caused this, to put his hands all over my body. Because that's what it would be, I didn’t think there was a part of me that hadn’t been bruised, at least that's what it felt like. I thought about what Hosea had said. Why should I care what Dutch was feeling, after what he had done, and how the hell could we be good for each other! I couldn’t imagine Dutch being good for anyone, least of all me.

I closed my eyes, I was sore and I was tired. I wondered what would happen, once I had healed up. Sure I had a bounty on my head, but knowing that, I would be a bit more aware. It didn't mean I had to stay here. With that thought in my mind, I drifted off to sleep.

_I stood on the scaffold, and felt the noose tighten around my neck. _

“_Your a very bad person, and you deserve to die!”_

_I looked across at the sheriff, only it wasn't the sheriff, it was Dutch_

“_No!” I screamed, “I didn't do anything!”_

_I watched as he pulled the lever. Then I felt myself falling_

“_No!!” I screamed!_

“Jesse...Sweetheart, wakeup!” he soothed.

I opened my eyes. My breath was coming in ragged gasps.

When my eyes began to focus, I saw him, Dutch. Sitting on the edge of the cot, stroking my forehead.

“N...No!” I sobbed, the tears that had been pooling in my eyes, started to flow, cascading down my cheeks.

“Y...You were g...Going to hang me!”

I felt his hand on my back, it was warm on my bare skin.

“No Jesse, no ones gonna hang you, or hurt you. I promise,” he soothed, as he pulled me into his chest, his other hand cupping the back of my head.

I let him hold me, half of me wanting to pull away from the monster that had done this to me, the other half needing the comfort that he was providing.

His hand started to rub circles, gently on my back.

“Its gonna be ok,” he soothed, as he kissed my forehead.

I pressed my head into his chest. I could hear his heart beating, faster than I expected.

Unexpectedly he pushed me away, and lay me back on the cot.

He stood up and looked down at me.

“Please Dutch,” I begged, “don’t go,” my tears still falling.

Dutch smiled gently, as he leant over and wiped my tears with his thumb.

“You’re sure you want me to stay,” he whispered.

I nodded. Then I watched him as he stood up, unbuckled his gun belt, took off his boots, then his waistcoat. He carefully folded his waistcoat and laid it on the chair, before coming over to the cot, and laying next to me.

Dutch wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into his chest, his hands gently caressing my back, sending shivers through my body.

“I’m going to look after you now,” he whispered, “protect you, and chase all your nightmares away.”

For the first time in a long while, I felt safe.

I shouldn't feel safe, not after everything he had done to me. But for some reason I did. I closed my eyes, taking in his scent. Every so often a moan would escape from my lips, not from the pain in my bruised and battered body, but from the way his hands moved against my bare skin, with a feather like touch. Sometimes his whole hands, then just his fingertips, knowing exactly where to touch me, to send tingles, to each and every nerve.

Each time I moaned, his lips would gently brush my forehead, in a sweet kiss.

“So precious,” he whispered.

How a violent outlaw could be so gentle was beyond me.

That was how he held me, I don't know how long for. Maybe I drifted off to sleep intermittently, but as soon as I was awake, I felt him. Clinging onto me as if both our lives depended on it. Maybe they did. Maybe Hosea was right.

It was Hosea’s voice, which would finally disturb us.

When he walked into the tent, I felt the change in Dutch.

“Josiah’s outside, he needs to see you,” Hosea insisted.

For the first time, Dutch’s hand stilled.

“He’ll have to wait, I’m busy,” he snapped.

I opened my eyes, my hand gently resting on Dutch’s shirt. I could feel his muscles tense beneath the thin material.

Hosea hummed, “you don't look very busy.”

Dutch turned his head, to look at Hosea, “Jesse needs me right now,” he growled.

I pressed my hand against Dutch’s chest, to get his attention.

His head snapped round to look at me and he smiled gently.

“It’s ok,” I whispered, “if you have to go.”

I watched him, as he looked at me, he was thinking, concocting some sort of plan.

He kissed me gently on the forehead. I thought he was going to go, but he didn't.

Dutch turned to look at Hosea, “Throw me a spare shirt.”

I watched as Hosea rifled around in the trunk on the other side of the tent. He grabbed one of Dutch’s shirts.

One of Dutch’s hands left my back, and he held it out, as Hosea tossed the shirt to him.

He caught it easily.

“Give me five minutes, then send Josiah in,” he ordered.

Hosea nodded, and left the tent.

Dutch looked at me again, “Lets put this on you, then I’ll see what that fool wants,” he concluded, smiling gently.

Dutch helped me to sit, then he gently dressed me in his spare shirt. It was way too big, but in a way that was good, it was less pressure on my battered body.

He sat with his legs over the side of the cot, and he rested my head on his lap, gently stroking my face. Ensuring the lower half of my body was covered by the blanket.

“This shouldn’t take long,” Dutch whispered, “just try and rest.”

I closed my eyes, still feeling his hand gently stroking my face. Flipping between my cheek and my forehead, then raking his fingers though my hair.

I lay there with my eyes closed, only half listening as Josiah came into the tent.

“Sorry Dutch,” Josiah apologised, “but this is urgent,” he hesitated, “is she...alright?”

I sensed Dutch focussing on me, as his fingers move gently across my forehead.

“She will be. Now what’s so urgent?” Dutch questioned.

Josiah hummed, hesitating slightly. “Your little encounter with the sheriff in Strawberry...”

Dutch sighed, “what of it?”

Josiah sighed, “Bounty hunters, they’re onto you Dutch. With everything that's gone on around here, it won’t be long before they track you down!”

I opened my eyes at the word Bounty hunters,

“Dutch!” I exclaimed, panic in my voice.

Dutch’s focus returned to me, “its Ok Jesse,” he soothed.

His gaze flicked back to Josiah.

“Thank you, can you ask Arthur to come in.”

Josiah nodded, “I couldn’t not tell you.”

Dutch nodded.

I watched as Josiah left the tent, my heart racing at the thought of bounty hunters. I wondered whether this was what everyone felt like when they were on the run. How on earth were they able to survive with the constant fear of being caught. Or maybe they weren't afraid.

I was roused from my thoughts by Dutch.

“Its gonna be ok, Jesse,” he soothed.

“Aren’t you scared?” I hesitated, “I mean, not just now, but all the time?”

Dutch stroked my face, and chuckled, “I’ve been running for over twenty years now,” he rolled his eyes, “bounty hunters ain't that bright!”

I looked over towards the tent flap, as it opened and Arthur came in.

He looked at me, then at Dutch, “Alright?” he asked.

Dutch nodded, “I need you to find us a new camp, son. Micah reckoned there's a place near Dewberry Creek. Take Charles.”

Arthur rolled his eyes, “why now?” he grumbled.

Without taking his eyes of Arthur, he gently stroked my forehead.

“Same as always, son. Bounty hunters!” Dutch quickly replied.

Arthur looked at me and shook his head, “So if she hadn’t been so bloody stubborn when me and Micah tried to break her out, then we wouldn't have to up and move again!” he grumbled.

“Arthur!” Dutch growled, “just do as I ask!”

Arthur glared at me, and rolled his eyes. He turned on his heel and stormed out the tent, muttering something under his breath, which I couldn’t make out.

I sighed, maybe it was my fault that they were having to move, but then I didn't do anything to end up in the Strawberry jail in the first instance.

“Don’t take any notice of Arthur,” Dutch soothed, “now I need to put some of this cream on your back, otherwise we’ll have Hosea after us, and he’s a lot more fearsome than any bounty hunters!” he quipped.

Dutch helped me to sit, and removed the shirt, then he helped me to lay on my stomach.

“Now this may hurt a little, but you must try and relax.” he explained.

With my head turned to the side, I watched as he removed his rings, and placed them on the table.

He opened the tub, which Hosea had brought in, and put some of the cream on the tips of his fingers.

I felt the cot go down, as he rested one knee on it, hovering over my back. He gently started massaging the cream into my back.

I thought I would be tense, but I found myself relaxing. Every so often, when he found a bruise, I would wince slightly, which he responded to with a lightened touch.

All was going nicely until I felt his hand on my butt. Not just his fingertips, but his whole hand, one on each cheek, just lingering there, a little too long.

“What are you doing!” I exclaimed.

Dutch chuckled, darkly. “Gotta make sure I’m thorough, and besides, you’ve got one of the cutest arses I’ve ever seen.”

I looked up at his face, to see him licking his lips, his eyes filled with pure lust.

“That’s enough,” I scolded angrily. I tried to swat his hand away with my own, but he grabbed my wrist, and held it in the small of my back. Before I had a chance to use the other one, he’d grabbed that too. He held both with one hand, and ran his fingers down the outside of my thigh.

I squirmed, as a shock wave of pleasure rushed through me.

Dutch chuckled, then I felt his lips press a gentle kiss to each cheek.

“I know what you want, Jesse!” he purred.

Breath hitched in my throat.

“I...I...” I stuttered. Only to hear him laugh again.

Both hands now held my wrists in place behind my back, as he turned me over.

He looked me in the eye darkly.

“But I never take anything, unless it’s freely given,” he hesitated, “well mostly,” he growled.

I suddenly felt vulnerable, laying on my back completely naked.

“Dutch!” I gasped, “Please...Don’t!”

He looked at me, and licked his lips, as he released my wrists and his hands gently slid up my back, until the back of my head was cupped in his hands.

His lips connected with mine, gently at first as his fingertips massaged the back of my head, then his kisses became more intense.

I didn't want to, but I couldn’t help myself, as I kissed him back and allowed his tongue entry. His tongue easily dominated my own, but the taste of him was bliss.

Our lips, eventually parted, leaving me gasping for breath.

Dutch smiled, “you need me Jesse, don’t deny it. Fate has brought us together. This was meant to be!”

I closed my eyes, catching my breath. When I opened them, I looked him in the eye.

“I...I just need time.” I gasped.

Dutch smiled, as he gently stroked my cheek. “We have all the time in the world, Princess.” He purred, as he kissed me on the forehead.


	17. What If?

I lay there staring into his eyes. Dutch sat on the edge of the cot. His hand holding the side of my throat, his thumb gently stroking the mark made by the rope. So warm, so gentle, so strong. I looked at him, knowing if he had the intention, he could crush the life out of me.

His other hand, gently stroked my arm. I had seen many looks in Dutch’s eyes since I met him, Anger, curiosity, humour, jealousy, lust, but this was a different look, one I couldn’t fathom.

“No one will ever hurt you again,” he whispered, his voice deep and throaty, almost a growl.

I took a deep breath, If I was honest, he still scared me a little.

“Dutch?” I questioned.

He smiled, “what is it, Jesse?”

I touched my hand to his chest.

“Will you tell me now? About the ruby?” I asked, hesitantly.

The smile dropped from his face, and he had a far away look in his eye, which lasted for a few seconds.

“You don’t have to, if you don't want to,” I quickly added.

Dutch looked at me again, and smiled.

“No, I will,” he replied. “We’ll be moving soon, I’ll fetch you some clothes, then I’ll travel with you. I’ll tell you everything.” He added.

I smiled back, “thank you.”

Dutch bit his bottom lip, still gazing at me. “Anything for you, Jesse.”

His hand moved from my throat, and cupped my jaw, as his thumb slowly stroked my cheek.

He gently kissed my forehead, “Now I’ll go and see if Susan has your clothes.”

I watched him as he stood up, and put his rings back on, followed by his gun belt, boots and waistcoat.

He picked up his hat, and with a quick glance and a smile, he headed out of the tent.

I found it hard to believe that he had gone to such trouble to keep me here. No one had gone to that sort of trouble before.

I pulled the blanket up, so the it was just under my chin. I closed my eyes, and went over in my mind everything that had happened. Was this really fate, or just a chain of coincidences.

That look in his eye, could it be...No, that was silly.

I didn't have to wait long, before I watched the tent flap open. I was surprised to see Susan Grimshaw walk in with a pile of clothes.

She put them on the end of the cot.

“You should get dressed, we’ll be leaving soon. Well as soon as we dismantle this tent.” she added.

She gave me the distinct impression that I was holding everyone up. Similar to the impression that Arthur had given me, that it was my fault that they were having to move.

It didn't really seem fair. After all, I didn’t ask for Dutch to love… Wait a minute! Did that thought just enter my mind! That was ridiculous. He was just lusting after me. That was all.

I sighed and sat up, grabbing the clothes and started to dress.

I rummaged through the pile of clothes, noticing there was no bra. I looked down at my chest, and rib cage. The bruising had already started to show. I guessed the last thing I needed was a tight bra. It was painful enough anyway, probably where the ribs had broken.

I slowly started to dress myself, noting that the shirt she had brought for me, wasn't my own. The rest of the underwear, pants, trousers and boots were. The ones that I had been wearing when I was about to be hung.

The thought sent a shiver through my spine, and my hand immediately went to the rope burn, on my neck.

I sat there, my mind in a far away place. Imagination running riot, as to what might have happened if the rope hadn't been shot away.

“Jesse… Jesse!”

I shook my head, and blinked as I was jolted back to reality.

I stared at Dutch blankly, almost as though I was looking through him, my hand still clutching my throat.

He quickly sat down beside me on the cot. He put his arm around me, and gently moved my hand away from my throat.

“Its ok,” he soothed.

I looked at him, staring, glassy eyed. “What if you’d missed? What if the rope hadn’t broken?”

He squeezed my hand, “but it did break, and besides it wasn't me, it was Micah, and he never misses. Now lets finish getting you dressed.”

I looked down, I was sitting on the edge of the cot in just a shirt and a pair of knickers. I blushed.

Dutch chuckled, “don't mind me I’ve seen you in a lot less, but we really need to get this tent dismantled, and you onto the wagon.”

Once I was dressed, Dutch helped me to stand.

“You’re gonna be ok, Jesse. Trust me,” he whispered.

I nodded, a blank look on my face.

As we left the tent, I saw Arthur standing there frowning.

“Is she gonna be ok?” he asked, looking at Dutch.

“Of course,” Dutch replied.

But I could tell by the look on his face that he wasn't convinced, and to be honest neither was I.

I couldn't help getting flashbacks, still feeling the rope around my neck, even though it wasn't there.

Dutch helped me into the back of the wagon, and climbed in after me. I was surprised he was travelling that way.

There were some blankets and pillows in the back. He sat down, and I laid with my head on his lap.

We didn't have to wait long before the wagons started to roll.

I looked up at his face, gazing into his eyes I saw something that looked a little like regret, before he spoke.

“Now, you still want to know about this ruby?” he asked.

I nodded.

“Very well.” he started to gently stroke my forehead, as though it soothed him somehow. He then told me the story of the ruby, and other things.

I understood now, why he’d had the far away look in his eye, whenever he spoke of it. By the time he had finished, my eyes were glazed with tears.

He told me the story of Annabelle. How he loved her, and how she loved him. The first gift she ever bought him was the watch with the ruby chain. How he had seen her die in front of him, when Colm O’Driscoll shot her. Seeing her life force trickle away, the blood the same colour as the ruby she had given him, a token of her love for him. He’d given her a ring, a token of his love for her. The same ring, he now wore on his little finger. He told me of the women that came after, but how he could never love anyone, not the same way as he had loved his beloved Annabelle.

Then he looked at me, and wiped away the tear that had escaped my eye, with the calloused pad of his thumb.

“Until now,” he whispered, and then he pressed his lips to mine, so gentle and chaste.

I gazed into his eyes, it felt like they were sucking the very soul right out of me. Had he said, what I thought he had, without actually saying the words.

Was he right, had fate brought us together. Was Hosea right, would we really be good for each other. No one had really loved me before, not my father, and definitely not Billy. Or was I just being a fool. Could I really be falling for an Outlaw, and if I wasn't, would I be breaking this poor man's heart for a second time.


	18. An Unusual Ally

When the wagons finally cam to a stop it was a pleasant surprise. Being close to the lake I thought I would find soothing. I always used to find being close to the water relaxing. Used to, being the operative word. Looking out onto the water, did nothing to still the thoughts running through my mind.

If it wasn’t flashbacks to the hanging, and the rope around my neck. It was the thought of Dutch, wanting to smother me. Even if it was with love. The guilt that I felt, because if I didn't love him back, then I would break his heart for the second time.

I wasn't sure I could love him. He thought that by showing me that my father, Eddie and Billy didn't really care for me, would make me want to be with him. Maybe even love him. The only thing it showed me was that you could never really trust anyone.

  
So I sat in the back of the wagon, where Dutch had left me. Telling me to rest while they set up camp. I stared across the lake, my fingers and thumbs pressed to the rope burns on my throat, completely unaware of what was going on around me, reliving every second of the trauma in strawberry, over and over.

  
“Miss Maddox?”

I looked around, brought back to reality. I looked at the man I’d only seen once before. As soon as I saw him, I scowled.

“Mr Bell!” I hissed.

He jumped onto the back of the wagon, landing on his bottom.

“Please, call me Micah.”

I huffed, and rolled my eyes. If it hadn’t been for him I wouldn't have a bounty on my head.

“I’d rather call you nothing at all, after all its your fault I’m in this current predicament!” I scowled.

Micah glared at me, “don’t bother to thank me for saving your miserable life, will ya!”

I stared at him nonplussed.

“If you hadn’t framed me in the first place, you wouldn’t have had to!” I retorted, angrily.

He shrugged, which only fuelled my anger.

“I was only following the bosses orders,” he hesitated, “why don’t I see if I can make it up to ya?”

I frowned at him, “how could you possible make it up to me? you killed my boyfriend, I’ve been made into a fugitive, I almost got hung!”

I instantly felt the mark around my neck.

Micah jumped off the back of the wagon, and held his hand out.

“At least let me try?” He offered.

I sighed, what did I have to lose. I took his hand, and he helped me down off of the wagon.

  
Micah took off his bandanna and went to blindfold me.

I immediately put my hand up, to fend him off.

“What the hell are you doing?” I demanded.

He smirked, “It’s a surprise, trust me!”

I rolled my eyes, “trust you, the man who framed me!”

Micah chuckled, “alright then humour me, it ain’t nothing bad!”

I sighed and nodded, allowing Micah to blindfold me.

He took my arm, and lead me across the compound that would eventually become the new camp.

I had no idea where I was going, but eventually he stopped.

“I’m gonna take off the blindfold, but keep your eyes closed,” he requested.

I did as he asked, and felt him remove the blindfold. He took my hand, and pressed it against something. It was a horse, I could gather that much from my sense of touch.

“Ok, open your eyes,” he smirked.

  
I opened my eyes, and looked at the horse, then looked at Micah.

“Honey!” I exclaimed.

I wrapped my arms around her neck, and kissed her.

I looked at Micah, and smiled.

“Thank you,” I enthused, my voice cracking. I was close to tears but managed to hold them back.

Micah nodded, “I know what Baylock means to me, so I guessed the least I could do was get you your horse back.”

I nodded, “I do appreciate this.”

Micah nodded, “I know,” he hesitated, “I don’t do this for everyone,” he scoffed, and he grabbed hold of my shoulders.

“What...” I didn't even get the chance to finish the sentence, as he was wrapping his bandanna around my throat. He gently tied it.

“I know what's going on with you, I know you’re having nightmares, and I know you can still feel the rope around your neck.” he stated.

I stared at him, feeling the material he had just put around my neck.

“How?” I asked, dumbfounded.

Micah chuckled, “probably won’t surprised you to know, that they’ve tried to hang me a few times. First time was the worst. Took me a while to stop feeling the rope around my neck.”

I put my hand to the material of the bandanna. It was soft.

“And this?” I asked.

He rolled his eyes, “It don't feel nothin’ like rope. Your senses’ll feel that, before your imagination feels the rope. Plus if you don’t keep bothering them rope burns, they’ll heal that much quicker.”

I nodded, “and the nightmares?”

Micah put his arm around me, “That may take a while longer, but they’ll go...in time.”

I smiled, “Thank you Micah, for this, and for saving me. I don’t think anyone else realises what its like, you know, the hanging and everything.”

Micah nodded, “unless you’ve been through it, you don’t understand,” he hesitated. “I’m ain’t sure why Dutch did what he did, ‘cause if that was me and you said you were leaving, I wouldn’t have chased ya, I’d have told you to fuck off.” He laughed.

I chuckled, “that would have my my life so much simpler!”

  
I gave Honey another pat, but before we could head back into the main area of the camp, I heard Dutch, ranting and raving.

“Where the hell is she then, I left her in the wagon!” He yelled.

I rolled my eyes, as we walked back into camp. As soon as he saw me, he came storming across.

“Where the hell have you been? And why are you wearing Micah's bandanna?” he growled.  
I glared at him,“It's not like I can go anywhere is it? Not after what you did!”  
I walked past him, but stopped. I wasn't finished. I turned and glared at him.  
“If you had any idea what I was going through right now, you would have offered me yours. But you don't care. Either that, or as per usual you're just thinking about yourself, and what you want. There's really only one person that Dutch Van Der Linde cares about, and that's himself. If it was any different you'd have realised what you'd done!”  
I stormed off towards the lake.  
“Jessie! Get back over here right now!”He demanded.  
I stopped and turned to look at him, tears pooling in my eyes, “maybe it would have been better if you'd let the sheriff hang me!”  
I turned once again heading towards some the lake, tears trickling down my cheek, unseen by Dutch.

  
I sat down by the waters edge. How the hell had it come to this? How could my life have gone so horribly wrong?  
I looked up as I heard footsteps crunching along the gravel of the shore.  
“It could be worse!” Sadie commented.  
I stared at her in disbelief.  
“How the fuck could it be any worse!” I snapped. “I've been framed for a murder I didn't commit, they tried to hang me! Every time I close my eyes I relive the whole thing!”

Sadie rolled her eyes, “You’re ain’t the only one who’s had it bad, I lost my husband, the love of my life.”

I looked at her and shook my head, “I’m sorry for what happened to you Sadie, but you’re not stuck here, you can leave any time you like!”

She looked at me and folded her arms, “and where exactly would I go? Eh,” she hissed.

I stood up. “Anywhere. You can go anywhere, do anything, be anyone you want to be. I’ve had that chance taken away from me, and for what?”

Sadie sighed, “he’s not a bad man, you should give him a chance.”

I rolled my eyes, “he’s a fucking outlaw, Sadie. He kidnapped me, tried to seduce me, and then arranged to have me framed, just so he could keep me here! I’m struggling to see the good, or tell me, am I missing something?”

Sadie shook her head, “life ain’t always fair, Jessie. Ya just have to make the best of what you’re given.” She turned and walked away.

  
I watched her go. Easy to say that, when you still have your freedom. Something that I would never have again.

I looked out over the lake, trying to find some sort of inspiration. Trying to decide what to do next. Maybe I should just leave, hand myself in to the nearest sheriff. Get it over with, let them hang me. Or embrace the life of an outlaw, learn to shoot. I’m sure Micah would teach me, if I asked him. If I could learn to shoot well enough, I could leave. Then if I got chased by bounty hunters, I would put up a fight. But one step at a time, my first problem was what to do about Dutch.


	19. A Ride Out

I sat on an overturned log, gazing out across the lake. With the sun glinting off of the surface of the water, there was no doubt, it was a lovely spot. After my outburst to Sadie, I had been left alone. Not just by Dutch but pretty much everyone. I wasn't sure of that was due to my foul mood or because everyone else was too busy, making this place into a new home.

The quiet was interrupted when I heard the sound of spurs clinking on the wooden boards of the dock. I didn't need to look around to know who it was. I recognised his scent immediately.  
"Are you ok? " Dutch asked tentatively.  
I sighed, "define ok?"  
There was an awkward silence.

“Susan has the tent setup, if you wanna get some rest?” he offered.

I sighed, and turned my head to look at him.

“How do you expect me to get any rest, when every close my eyes I see someone putting a rope around my neck, feel the rope around my throat?” I scoffed.

He looked at me, and sighed.

“I never wanted this to happen, for you to be suffering like this.”

I rolled my eyes, “what did you think would happen, when you framed me for murder. Its what they do to murderers, they hang ‘em!”

Dutch looked at me and shook his head. He sat down next to me on the log.

“You weren’t supposed to go as far as the scaffold, you were supposed to be broken out of the jail!” he retorted.

I folded my arms across my chest, and glared at him.

“So its my fault is it?” I snapped.

He shook his head, “of course not,” he hesitated, “come with me Jesse, lets go out for a ride, just you and me?”

“Go out for a ride? Are you crazy? I’m wanted, there are bounty hunters after me!” I exclaimed.

Dutch chuckled, “I’ve had a bounty on me for the past twenty odd years, it doesn’t stop me from doing what I want to do, and it shouldn’t stop you either. I know you’re worried about being stuck in camp forever, it doesn’t have to be like that.”

I uncrossed my arms, and nodded. After everything that had happened, it would make a nice change.

  
We walked towards the hitching area. He didn't attempt to put his arm around me, which I was grateful for. As we reached the horses, I notice that Honey and The Count were already saddled up. I wondered if he’d known that I’d agree to go. But then, I suppose if I’d declined, he would have just asked Kieran to unsaddle them again.

As I approached Honey, a felt him walk behind me.

“Let me help you,” he offered.

I wanted to turn around and tell him I was quite capable of mounting my own horse, but he was making an effort, and my ribs were still a little tender, so instead I thanked him.

I felt his hands on my waist, as he lifted me effortlessly onto Honey. I patted her neck, and smiled. Probably for the first time since the whole ordeal. I had missed her, more than anything.

I watched as he mounted The Count.

“So where are we going,” I asked, as we rode down the track.

“Somewhere quiet, where we can talk.” He replied.

I nodded. It might be best if we both talked about exactly how we were feeling. Although right now I didn't really know what I was feeling. One minute I was hating him for what he had done, the next I was wanting him to comfort me. When he kissed me, or touched me, I didn't pull away. I really didn't know what I wanted.

  
We headed north again, towards Scarlet Meadows. To say I was nervous was and understatement. Looking over my shoulder every five minutes, to make sure we weren’t being followed by bounty hunters. Which of course we weren’t.

I didn't really have a clue where we were headed, as I’d never been this far south. It was pretty enough country though. As we changed direction and headed east, we entered into a lightly wooded area. We then came upon a clearing with a small fishing hole. The sun glinted through the tree canopy, causing the stream which fed the pond to sparkle.

Dutch reined in in his horse, and hitched him to a tree, before jumping off. I reined in Honey, and he was immediately there, helping me down. Give the man his due, he was a gentleman, well in some respects.

He gently lifted me to the ground, his hands lingering on my waist. I didn't need to say anything. I think the look in my eyes told him not to push his luck.

Once he had let go, I hitched Honey to a tree.

  
Dutch lifted one of the saddlebags off The Count, and lead me over to a grassy area, next to the pond. He pulled a blanket from the bag, and laid it on the ground.

“Come and sit,” he gestured.

I sat down on the blanket, and he sat down as well.

He pulled some supplies out of the saddlebag. A couple of glasses, a bottle of wine. Some bread and cheese. He’d obviously planned ahead, before he even suggested the trip.

He poured two glasses, and handed me one, which I took.

I couldn’t look him in the eye though. So instead, I gently swirled the wine in the glass and took a sip.

He sighed, “I know you probably don’t believe me, but I never meant for things to turn out this way,” he hesitated, “for you to end up hurt, and hating me.”

I shook my head. “I don’t hate you Dutch, I just don’t understand you. Why would you tell me to leave, then go to those lengths to get me back.”

He took my hand, running his thumb across my knuckles.

“Because I care about you,” he started, “if you had left, and tried to make a fresh start, what would you have done? Where would you have gone?” He asked.

I shrugged, “St. Denis, maybe or Blackwater.”

“Exactly. You’d have started off waitressing at the local saloon, and when you found you couldn’t make enough to put a roof over your head, you would have started stealing.” He retorted.

I scowled at him, “you don’t know that!”

Dutch looked at me and nodded, “yes I do, I’ve seen it before. You would have either ended up being assaulted by some drunk bum on your way home, or you would have got caught thieving, and ended up in Sisika or worse!”

I felt my face heat up, as I blushed. Only because I knew that what he was saying was probably true. Even when I was pickpocketing in Valentine, I’d had a few close calls. It was only Billy and Eddie who had saved my skin. Only because they didn't want the hassle of finding another female pickpocket.

“So why did you keep changing your mind? One minute you wanted me to stay, the next minute you’re telling your friend Josiah that its only temporary!” I chided.

Dutch narrowed his eyes, and gulped down his glass of wine, before refilling it.

“Because I found out you had a boyfriend!” he growled.

I put my glass down, and looked him in the eye, “You were jealous!” I mocked, “jealous of a boyfriend that left me at the first sign of trouble, and stole my horse! He wasn’t even a proper boyfriend!”

Dutch picked up the bottle, and went to refill my glass, until I shook my head.

“Oh no Dutch Van Der Linde, I know your game. Your gonna try and get me drunk so you can take advantage of me!”

He sighed and put the bottle down, “you really think that little of me?” he asked, a look of hurt on his face.

“Well you thought that little of me, when you cast me off. Just because you thought that Billy was my boyfriend!” I retorted.

  
We stared at each other in silence for a few minutes. This wasn't getting us anywhere.

“Why didn’t you just ask me, instead of going off in a sulk! He was just a friend, and not a very good one!” I added.

Dutch frowned, “you mean you and he, never...”

I laughed, “seriously Dutch, you saw him. Give me some credit, for crying out loud!”

He smiled and shook his head, “There’s something I have to tell you, Jesse.”

I frowned, not sure if I wanted to hear it, but whatever it was, if he didn't tell me now, he would certainly find a way to tell me later.

“Go on...” I encouraged, albeit hesitantly.

“I wasn’t telling the whole truth when I said I cared about you. I more than care about you Jesse… I ...” he started, but I interrupted him.

“No! Don’t say it Dutch. I get you like me, and I get you care about me, but anything else is just lust!”

I looked at him, looked him in the eye. Trying to read him.

He reached out with his hand, and gently touched my cheek.

“No, Jesse. Its not just lust. I knew it from the first moment I saw you, in the saloon in Valentine. Before you robbed me.”

I closed my eyes and shook my head. “Please, Dutch. Don’t say it, because I can’t say it back.”

When I opened my eyes I looked at Dutch and he was smiling.

“Just because you don't love me, wont stop me from loving you, Jesse. Maybe one day you will, or maybe you’ll fall in love with someone else. It wont change how I feel. So I’m going to say it,” he hesitated, for a split second. “Jesse Maddox. I love you, and I always will.”

Dutch leant forward, and his lips pressed against mine. I closed my eyes, I couldn’t help it, and I kissed him back.

When our lips parted, he smiled. I looked at him, a little dazed at what had just occurred.

“I know your a little confused right now, Jesse. I know you need time. Its enough for me now to know you don’t hate me.”

I looked at him, as he stood up and packed away the picnic, that was virtually untouched. He held out his hand.

“C’mon, we better get back, or they’ll think we’ve been captured by bounty hunters,” he chuckled, winking at me.

I smiled, “now you’re just teasing me.”

I stood up, and folded up the blanket, before passing it to him.

He walked back over to the horses, and put the saddlebag back onto The Count.

I slowly walked over to Honey. Dutch stood there, leaning against The Count, just staring at me.

“Are you just gonna stand there, or are you gonna help me onto my horse?” I smirked.

Dutch chuckled, and walked over to where I was standing. He put his hands around my waist, and gently lifted me onto Honey. As I sat in the saddle, his hands rested on my thighs. He looked up at me.

“So Miss Maddox, would you like me to arrange a separate tent, or would you like to continue sharing mine?” He asked.


	20. Revelations

The ride back to camp was silent, if not a little strained. The look on Dutch’s face when I said I would prefer to be in a separate tent said it all. He said that he understood, but I wasn't quite sure that he did. I hadn’t really decided where the future would lie, for us. At this moment in time I just needed some space. Since being with the gang, either as a prisoner, or as a guest, I had always been with Dutch. Never really being able to be my own person. I say guest, but in truth I had never really been that. I had never really been free to come and go as I pleased. I didn't even know if that was the case now. One thing he had shown me today, was that despite being wanted, there weren’t bounty hunters waiting to pounce on me at every turn. Having said that, I still wanted to learn how to shoot, but now hadn’t seemed the right time to ask about getting me a gun. There were other priorities, like clothes. All mine had been seized by the bounty hunters when they found me in Valentine, and shipped me over to Strawberry.

  
When we arrived back at camp, the sun was beginning to set. He jumped off his horse first, then came over and helped me off Honey. I wouldn’t have blamed him, if he’d left me to it. I guess he wasn’t that sort of man. He yelled over to Keiran to deal with the horses. I would have quite happily sorted them out. Although to be fair, I was aching a little.

“Miss Grimshaw!” Dutch yelled out, as we walked back towards where all the tents were.

She appeared from behind a wagon.

“What is it?” she asked, somewhat tersely.

“I need you to setup another tent… for Miss Maddox!” he stated.

I stiffened slightly, it didn't feel quite right when he called me that. When he called me Jesse it always seemed warmer somehow.

Susan huffed, “It’ll take a while, I hope you weren’t planning on going to bed just yet!”

I shook my head, “I’ll go sit by the fire for a bit,” I offered.

Susan rolled her eyes, and walked off, yelling for Mr Pearson, who I guessed would be erecting the tent.

  
As I walked over towards the fire, I got a few strange looks. It was almost as if now I wasn't sharing a tent with Dutch, I was almost unwelcome. I ignored them, and sat down by the fire.

I hadn’t been seated long, when I heard a voice I recognised.

“Good evening, Miss Maddox!”

I turned around, and sighed, “Mr Trelawny!”

He came and sat down. I felt he was partially to blame for my current state. He appeared to be the person who would gather intelligence for Dutch. I somehow doubted that the gang would have found Billy so easily, if it hadn’t been for him. If he hadn’t found Billy, then Micah wouldn’t have killed him, and I wouldn’t have nearly been hung.

“How are you fairing, Miss Maddox?” he asked.

I looked at him, from what I could tell he was being sincere. But then he was a con man, so it could well be he was just asking the question to be polite. Besides going on my current track record, I didn't really trust my judgement.

“As well as you can imagine, after almost being hung!” I replied, dryly.

He hummed, then hesitated. “I think there’s something you should know.” he offered.

I sighed, and rolled my eyes.

“This seems to be my day for revelations, do go on!” I replied, somewhat sarcastically.

Josiah frowned, “you probably already know, or you’ve guessed that I was the one who tracked your friend Billy down?”

I hummed. “I guessed as much, although not really much of a friend as it turned out, but go on.”

Josiah, wiped his mouth nervously. Most of what I didn't know, I’d managed to piece together, so I wasn't expecting any surprises.

“Dutch wanted me to find out what sort of a relationship the two of you had!” Josiah continued.

I chuckled, causing Josiah to frown.

“I know now Dutch was jealous, which is why he said my stay was only going to be temporary!” I confirmed.

Josiah nodded, “all should have been straight forward, when I found out that you and he were no more than friends...”

Now it was my turn to frown, “if you found out that, why did he bother having Billy killed?” I asked.

Josiah sighed, “I blame myself to a certain degree,” he hesitated, “I maybe shouldn’t have told Dutch what he said.”

I narrowed my eyes, “what did that little bastard say?” I hissed.

Josiah took a deep breath, “He said that he would have loved to get in your knickers, but...”

“But what, Josiah?” I interrupted.

I felt that whatever it was, Josiah was a little uncomfortable recounting it to me.

Josiah continued, “he said you were nothing but a frigid cock tease, and if he’d stuck around, he’d have had you, whether you wanted it or not.”

I felt my face heat up. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Realisation hit, on what a lucky escape I’d had.

“It was after I told Dutch, what he said, he told Micah to dispose of him,” Josiah added.

I held my head in my hands, then raked my fingers through my hair. I looked at Josiah.

“So Micah killed him, before Dutch decided to frame me for the murder?” I asked.

Josiah nodded, “just in case you went looking for him, in case you wanted some kind of reconciliation. He wouldn’t risk him doing something to you.”

I shook my head, and rolled my eyes.

“Why does he have to make things so god-damn complicated?” I groaned.

Josiah frowned, “I don’t understand, Jesse. What are you talking about?”

“Dutch,” I sighed. “I only found out today he was jealous of Billy, because he’d thought him and me where… Anyway, that's why I thought he had him killed, not to protect my honour! Why didn't he tell me, Josiah?”

Josiah shrugged, “he’s a complicated man, he doesn’t always tell people how he feels.”

I growled a scream of frustration.

“Why does he have to be so god-damn fucking perfect!” I growled.

Josiah chuckled. “Dutch is a lot of things, but perfect isn’t a word I use to describe him.”

  
Trouble was, Josiah didn't know the half of it. Despite what he’d done, getting me arrested, and almost getting me hung. He’d killed someone to protect me, and not told me. Then he’d said he loved me, but it didn't matter if I didn't love him back. Unless he had confided in Josiah. If he had, then he’d probably confided in Hosea too. After all they were best friends, almost like brothers.

“Josiah?” I asked, “did Dutch tell you anything else?”

Josiah smiled, “he didn't need to, but then I suspect you know that already. Maybe knowing why he had Billy killed, will help you to decide where you’re future lies, eh?”

I sighed, “I know what you’re thinking Josiah. The same as everyone else is thinking. That he and I should try and make a go of things, that I’m a bitch for not wanting to be with him.”

Josiah put his arm around me, “No Jesse, I don’t think you’re a bitch at all. Alot has happened in the short time you’ve known Dutch. But I do think maybe you should give the man a chance.”

Josiah smiled, “if its any consolation, I don't think there was one person who agreed with his little plan to get you arrested, but what’s done is done. He’s not perfect, but then none of us are.” he finished.

Josiah stood up, “just think about it, don't make any rash decisions, at least not yet.”

I nodded, “Thank you, Josiah. Oh and just because I decided to have a tent of my own, doesn't mean I’ve given up on him, I just need some time.”

Josiah raised his hat, and bowed. I watched as he walked across the camp to where the horses were hitched. I guessed he wasn't staying, and this had just been a flying visit.

I wasn't sure whether to confront Dutch, with the information that Josiah had given me. I guessed it could wait.

  
I gazed into the fire, for how long I didn't know. Until I felt a tap on my shoulder.

“Miss Maddox, your tent is ready if you’d like to follow me,” Mr Pearson informed me.

I smiled at him, “Thank you,” I replied, as I stood up.

He lead me over to a tent, which was next to Dutch’s. I wondered if that had been Dutch’s idea, or if that was the only viable space to put it. Either way it didn't really matter. For the first time, I had some privacy.

It was small, and sparse. A cot, a small table with a lantern and a chair. There was a chest at the bottom of the cot. I opened it, to take a look inside. It was of course empty. Normally that would be where I would keep my clothes, but I only had the clothes that I stood up in.

I sat on the edge of the cot, and pulled off my boots, then removed my trousers.

The cot wasn’t as comfortable as Dutch’s, but I was so tired, I would have slept anywhere. I lay down and covered myself with the blanket. Then I closed my eyes, and allowed myself to drift off to sleep. My sleep as usual was plagued with nightmares.

  
My own screaming woke me, coupled with the fact that my body was drenched in a cold sweat.

I held my face in my hands, trying to stifle the sobs, and to will my body to stop shaking.

The sound of the tent canvas being pulled back, made me remove my hands from my face. Under normal circumstances, it would have startled me, but trying to remove the visions from my waking mind left little room for further fear.

I looked up. “I’m sorry, I didn't mean to wake anyone,” I apologised.

Dutch walked over to the cot, “It’s not your fault, if its anyone's, its mine.”

He picked me up in his arms, blanket and all.

“What...” I started, but he didn't let me finish.

“I’m not having any arguments, I taking you back to my tent. I’ll get you out of these wet things. You don’t need to be alone when your having these night terrors, trust me.” He stated.

He carried me bridal style out of the tent, I didn't argue. As he carried me to his tent, several people watched. It appeared my screams hadn’t just woken Dutch.

“Do you need anything?” Susan asked, concern in her voice.

Dutch shook his head, “not right now, but I’ll need some clean clothes for Jesse in the morning.”

  
He sat me on his cot, and started to take off my damp shirt. I didn't protest. For most of the time before I had been sleeping in one of his shirts, or nothing, and to be honest, I didn't have the energy to fight.

He dried me off with the blanket. I shivered slightly, until he put one of his shirts on me. Then he wrapped his arm around me and held me close.

“Don’t worry, I’ll soon have you warm,” He whispered, “now lets get you into bed.”

I lay down on the cot, and he covered me with a blanket.

“I’m sorry Dutch,” I whispered, “If I hadn’t insisted on a separate tent, then you wouldn’t have had to run around the camp in the middle of the night.”

Dutch smiled, “these things have a way of working themselves out.”

I lay in his cot, with my eyes open. As exhausted as I was, I daren’t close my eyes. Instead I watched him, as he undressed. Once he was down to his underwear, he walked over and climbed onto the cot.

“Now I said I would keep you warm,” he whispered, as he wrapped his arms around me, and pulled me into his chest.

“Close your eyes, Jesse. You wont get much sleep with your eyes open!”

I lay my head on his chest, “I’m scared to close my eyes, scared I’ll fall asleep, scared of the nightmares,” I whispered, my voice cracking.

His hand stroked my face, then he ran his fingers through my hair.

“I know you are, but I’ll be here. You wont be alone Jesse. We’ll get through this together, I promise you.” He whispered, as he kissed the top of my head.

I closed my eyes, the gentle rise and fall of his chest, and his steady heartbeat relaxing me.

Maybe Sadie was right, maybe he wasn't such a bad man after all.


	21. Ulterior Motives

Dutch was true to his word. Every time, my sleep became disturbed with nightmares and bad dreams, he would gently rouse me to the edge of wakefulness, to allow me to drift back into a peaceful sleep. At least for a time. It kept my screams and the cold sweats at bay.

I’m not sure he slept much himself, unless he was a very light sleeper. Even though the fault of my night terrors was partially his, not many people would have gone to the lengths he did, to keep my nightmares away.

On the flip side, it meant he got his own way again, having me back in his tent, and in his bed.

I didn’t complain, of course. I’m sure that feeling his arms wrapped around me, and his warm body next to mine helped. When it came to the nightmares at least.

I tried not to think that he had carried me back to his tent for an ulterior motive. Even if it was just to keep me in his bed. Besides, if I hadn’t let out the blood curdling scream, he wouldn't have had to come in to my tent.

  
When I finally awoke, it was due to the sunrise lighting the tent. Not because I was having a nightmare. Dutch’s arms were wrapped around me, and I awoke to him stroking my back with the tips of his fingers. I did wonder, if that's what woke me up, rather than the sunshine, as I moaned with pleasure, before fully waking up.

“Dutch, what are you doing, where are my clothes!”I asked, frowning slightly, realising I was naked.

He chuckled, continuing to caress my back, “I’m keeping your nightmares at bay. Last night, every time you became restless, this calmed you down.”

“I don’t remember that!” I huffed.

Dutch chuckled, “That, and this...”

He slid his hand down my back, cupping my backside, the grazing his fingertips up and down the outside of my thigh.

A tingle of pleasure ran through my body, and I stifled a moan. At least I thought I had, but the look on Dutch’s face told me I was mistaken. I felt my face heat up. There was no hiding the change of colour which tinted my cheeks.

His other hand had cupped the back of my head, and his fingertips were gently massaging my skull.

He leaned into me, his face close to mine.

“Don’t fight it,” Dutch whispered.

But I was, or at least I was trying, and I didn't know why.

  
He pressed his lips to mine, I closed my eyes. I couldn't help but kiss him back, with a hunger that surprised me.

His hand moved from my thigh, and he rested it on my shoulder, gently pushing me so I was laying on my back. His kiss deepening, I melted under his touch, and opened my mouth to allow his tongue entry. Tasting him was intoxicating, as his tongue dominated mine, and our lips moved in sync.

When I our lips parted, he looked at me and smiled, brushing a stray hair behind my ear.

“You’ve no idea what you do to me Jesse, do you?” He growled, erotically.

I felt my face heating again, and I knew without looking it was bright red.

“I...I’m sorry,” I stuttered.

Dutch frowned, “you don’t feel the same...” He asked leaning away from me slightly.

I bit my bottom lip, “I..I… Don’t know!” I stuttered.

Dutch sat up, and stroked my cheek with his thumb.

He smiled confidently, “I think you know very well, Jesse. I think you just don’t want to admit it!”

I stared at him, not knowing what to say, because what he was saying was true.

He ran the tips of his fingers across my shoulder, then down my arm. It made my whole body tingle, and a quiet moan escaped my lips.

How was it he could make me feel like this.

His fingers snaked across my stomach, and his head dipped down, kissing my belly button.

“Do you like this, Jesse? Or do you want me to stop?” He whispered seductively.

I tried to talk, but all that came out of my mouth was a whimper, as he carried on kissing me, down my stomach.

My breath hitched in my throat, as his lips touched my inner thigh. I finally managed to speak.

“Dutch… Please!” I moaned.

I felt his fingertips trailed down, gently caressing my hips, as his thumbs rubbed circles across my pelvic bones..

“Please what?” he whispered, “you want me to stop?”

I shook my head. “N….n,” I mumbled, unable to complete the word, as a ripple of pleasure rushed through to my core, making me wet.

I bit down on my lip hard, trying to stop myself from moaning, as his tongue penetrated my folds.

I tried to buck my hips towards him, but he gently pressed down with his hands, holding me in place.

I felt his tongue, flick inside.

“Oh...god...Dutch...Please!” I screamed, as I felt myself getting close.

He withdrew, leaving me breathless and in agonising need.

“Jesus Jesse, you taste so fucking good,” he groaned.

I groaned, feeling empty, and not liking that feeling one little bit.

“Please Dutch,” I groaned, “I need...”

Dutch chuckled, “I know exactly what you need!”

I looked down at him, and gasped as you saw his erection.

“Please Dutch… I’ve never… No one’s ever...” I stuttered.

“I’ll be gentle,” he whispered, as I felt him slowly enter me, allowing me to adjust to his size.

I gasped, as he slowly pushed deeper. He was big, bigger than I expected, but I bucked my hips, needing the friction, to finish what he’d started with his tongue.

He slowly started to thrust, but I needed more.

I screamed, digging my nails into his shoulder.

“Dutch...Oh god...Please...Harder!” I begged, screaming. I needed my release.

He grazed his teeth over my now erect nipples.

“You’re so fucking perfect, Jesse,” He growled, as he picked up the pace, thrusting harder, faster and deeper. With each thrust he hit my sweet spot, making me cry out with ecstasy.

I felt my whole body shudder, as I climaxed. Moments later I felt his seed spill into me, as he did the same.

He pulled out, and collapsed onto the cot beside me. Both of us a sweating, heaving mess.

  
“Fucking hell Jesse!” Dutch exclaimed, chuckling. “You don’t know?” He questioned.

I looked over at him, “its you, you make me...I lose control.”

Dutch rolled onto his side, gazing at me. He leaned over, and resting his hand on my head, and stroking my forehead with his thumb.

“That's what I love about you, Jesse. We’re such a perfect fit.” he purred.

I swallowed hard, not wanting to ruin the moment, but I had to know.

“Dutch? Why didn’t you tell me about Billy?” I asked, hesitantly.

His thumb stopped moving, and he rolled his eyes

“Josiah!” he sighed.

I bit my lip, and frowned, “You probably saved me from...”

Dutch moved his hand from my head, and placed his forefinger on my lips.

“Sshh, its history. You’ve been hurt by enough people, I want you to forget it.”

I gently pushed his hand away, and looked him in the eye.

“How can I, how can I forget what you’ve saved me from?” I asked, tears pooling in my eyes.

Dutch smiled, and took my hand, gently kissing my knuckles.

“Then don’t think about the what, think about the why?” he whispered.

I took my hand, from his and gently touched his face.

“I don’t understand,” I whispered, “why would you want me, no one else has ever...”

“Then that's been their loss, Jesse, and I’m thankful for it.” He interrupted

He leaned into me, and pressed his lips to mine, in a gentle and chaste kiss.

“Now, as much as I’d like to spend the day with you in my cot,” Dutch smirked, “we have things to do!”

I sat up, then swung my leg over his, so I was straddling him. I put my hands on his chest.

I tilted my head, “are you gonna teach me to be an outlaw?”

Dutch chuckled, and placed his hands on my back, running his hands up and down.

He hummed, “a naked outlaw, that would be a novelty.”

I licked my lips, “I thought you liked me naked?”

“Oh I do Jesse,” he purred, “but this gorgeous body, is for my eyes only!”

His hands drifted down, and rested on the cheeks of my bottom. I squealed, as he squeezed them. He chuckled gutturally in response.

“You’re gonna be the death of me Jessie Maddox,” he growled, as he flipped me over onto my back.

I chuckled, as I put my hands around the back of his head, and pulled him into a kiss.

He kissed me back hungrily, then gently took my bottom lip in his teeth, before letting go.

“You really are something else, Jesse. D’you know that?” he whispered.

  
“Dutch?”

We both heard Susan's voice just outside the tent.

He grinned, and put his finger to his lip.

“Give me a second, Susan,” he responded, stifling a giggle like a child who’d been caught with his hand in the cookie jar.

He jumped off the cot and grabbed some clothes, raking his fingers through his hair, in an attempt to make it look a bit less dishevelled.

I grabbed the blanket, and covered myself up. Watching as he opened the tent flap.

“Susan!” he announced.

“I’ve brought Jesse some fresh clothes, and the trousers and boots from her tent,” she advised, glancing in the tent and looking at me.

“Is she ok?” she asked, some concern in her voice.

Dutch nodded, and took the pile of clothes.

“Thank you Susan, we’ll be out for breakfast shortly.”

She nodded, and turned away.

Dutch quickly closed the tent flap, as I covered my mouth with my hands, stifling a giggle.

He walked over, and put the clothes on the cot.

“C’mon,” he smirked, “You better get dressed, then I suppose I better explain to Susan why you wont be needing a separate tent anymore!”

I smirked, “and then you better start teaching me to be an outlaw.”

Dutch grinned at me, shaking his head, as he finished dressing.

“I should have realised you were gonna be trouble the minute I set eyes on you in Valentine!”


End file.
